Baron Von Steuben

He was like, this super badass immigrant gay himbo in the American Revolution and a bunch of crappy places are named after him. Okay so Germany kicked him out for being gay, Ben Franklin sent him and his boyfriend here, He did a bunch of awesome stuff, gave us some Prussian drilling, made us have half a chance against the British, wrote the first ever drill manual for the U.S., yelled at us in German and French, oh and he had a spoiled ass doggo he loved named Azor. Picked up two more twinks, got this lil ol house, died there, the end. He was friends with, like, all the important people your teacher actually tells you about. He was only being paid half. So yeah, he slayed.

random soldier: OH MY GOD WHO TF WAS THAT BARON VON STEUBEN GUY I HATE HIS BOOK, WHY DO WE HAVE TO CARRY IT AROUND!?
Me: Bro I wish I had one, BUT THEY'RE 80 FUCKING DOLLARS!?

200 years ago:
Baron Von Steuben: hey y'all I'm your new sugar daddy drillmaster
Du Ponceau: I'm his emotional support French twink
Walker: I'm just here for the money.
North: Hi, I'm one of the boyfriends, and I have a minor drinking problem
Azor: ruff ruff
AAAAAAND THAT'S THE BARON'S HAREM OF GAY FRENCHIES IN A NUTSHELL!
Washington: I don't get paid enough for this.
LaFayette: I don't get paid anything for this!

by IofogslawurysKisskiss April 25, 2024

bardonic ramen

fried ramen that you boil with blue powerade, preferably mountain berry blast

bardonic ramen is blue like sonic the hedgehog bitches!

by jag-stang29 June 3, 2024

Baron Void

A dark draconic leviathan of power, usually the best leader of a group.

User: Baron Void leaded my travel group last time, he protected us all from danger.

by Kara, Baron Void's lover June 6, 2024

Bartolomeo Cristofori

Bartolomeo Cristofori, also known as Bartolommeo di Francesco Cristofori, was an Italian instrument maker known for inventing the piano. Born in Padua, he initially worked for Prince Ferdinando de' Medici in Florence, where he was responsible for maintaining and creating musical instruments. Cristofori's most significant innovation was the development of the pianoforte—the predecessor of the modern day piano—, an instrument capable of both soft and loud dynamics, unlike the harpsichord, which had limited dynamic range. His earliest known pianos date back to the early 1700s, featuring mechanisms such as the hammer action, which allowed for more expressive playing.

Guy 1: Hey, out of curiosity, who was the inventor of the piano?
Guy 2: Hey Siri.
Siri: * Du dun*
Guy 2: Who invented the piano?
Siri: Bartolomeo Cristofori
Guy 1: Who?

by Treble Clef Maniac July 2, 2024

Baron Brains

When you’re too smart for the world. Top notch smartness than no one can compare to

I wouldn’t have even thought of that! She really has Baron Brains

by Minnnnnnn- February 12, 2024

Baron Bitchalot

A narcissist female boomer who never leaves her bed, only eats junk food, meddles in everyone’s affairs, and obsessively monitors the cable news network so she can fear-monger on social media.

Yo, you know if she’ll be at the family function?

Nah, dude. Baron Bitchalot can’t leave her bed. She’d get upset if anyone had fun anyway.

by anonymous April 2, 2024

Baron Bitchalot

A narcissist female boomer who never leaves her bed, only eats junk food, meddles in everyone’s affairs, and obsessively monitors the cable news network so she can fear-monger on social media.

Yo, you know if she’ll be at the family function?

Nah, dude. Baron Bitchalot can’t leave her bed. She’d get upset if anyone had fun anyway.

by anonymous April 2, 2024