helmeted warrior

An uncircumcised penis

I love sucking on the uncut foreskin of his helmeted warrior.

by Jade217 September 21, 2016

A helmet on an octopus

Right!? I was just thinking about this in the car. Right, so, the framework is like a helmet on an octopus. You're picturing it now aren't you? Nope. You're going it wrong you're thinking of a football helmet or a baseball helmet. You should be thinking of a rusty medieval plate helm. Do it right or you won't get any money.

Iam "Yeah, that's what I was leaning towards. It's like a helmet on an octopus. You can swap out the framework but it's (more or less) the thing they use to protect themselves from an uncertain world."

Hym "You are the laziest piece of shit on the planet!"

Iam "What!? What did I do?"

Hym "We have shit to do. You can't sit around and write all day!"

Iam "Sorry.... Alright got to go bye!"

by Hym Iam May 7, 2022

sticky roman helmet

When you give it one last yank and then tea bag someone.

Yea he left 25 mins later because he had to yank it before giving his girl a sticky roman helmet.

by caboosesam September 2, 2022

Speed Helmet

To get head in a very fast manner

Dan: Hey how was Happy Feet last night? I heared you only had like two minutes.
Matt: All i have to say is that "the whale" gives very good Speed Helmet

by mx, dp October 5, 2007

The Rigid Helmet

The historically accurate Viking erotica of J. G. Quintel 's universe in the series "Close Enough". Written by Alex Dorpenberger. Apparently, the erotica is good enough to reverse one's menopause.

Alex: The Rigid Helmet is historically accurate Viking erotica.

by thatVietDude April 12, 2022

Passionate Helmet

When a many places half a passionfruit over the end of his erect penis, then proceeds to have anal or vaginal sex.

Note: It's advised to use a ripe passionfruit that isn't too tart and a condom to hold the passionfruit half in place. If lost inside this becomes a vegan diva cup.

Oliver: Hey man, I've been trying it on with girl but I think my cock's too small, I can barely keep her wet. I asked the women in sex shop but she just laughed at me.
Mike: No worries mate, I've never had that problem, but I know just the thing. Give her the old Passionate Helmet, use half for a Pornstar Martini for her and half for your pink sausage and she'll be foaming like a Costa Coffee. Just for God sake put a rubber over it, you don't want her getting stuck with a vegan diva cup.
Oliver: Wow, cheers mate!

by PassionateSon April 21, 2020

Pork pie helmet

When you stand over a person who is sitting and stretch your scrotum across their forehead

And their she was sitting on the kitchen floor when I snuck up behind her and gave her a pork pie helmet

by THE IRON HIPPIE December 2, 2021