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Jared

Jared is a weeb, who loves emo’s and e-girls. A chronic vape addict whom spends all his money on league. hetero man who makes you feel like you’re the boss
Jared likes being stepped on
by Chronicle Editor February 6, 2025
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jared puga

a common name amongst latino homosexuals who enjoy having their poop shoot “tongue punched!”
June is my friend Jared Pugas favorite month, because of all of the silly made up holidays in that month. That same friend also goes to epstein island for a visit wit the best tongue puncher in the land.
by SillyBoyArDee July 25, 2023
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Jared

by Eeqwsfew November 4, 2021
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Jared

The epitome of laziness. Loves to fondle cats and touch their privates. When attacking a Jared, do not go for the head, because it is metal plated, you won’t phase him. Typically looks like they’re lost and walking in circles, but don’t interrupt them, this is how they think, and disturbing them could ruin their entire day.
Stop being a Jared.
by NickyRen October 18, 2022
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Jared

That guy that probably has a folder of furry porn on his computer, thats a Jared. The scent of him is like a slut hanging around just a bit too long at a truck shop, or a greasy corndog left too long in the sun at a renaissance festival.

A Jared is quite often the only man in the room to bring up his trip to Rainfurrest and how it wasn't so bad. He may also be the guy who sets jars of cum on the window to let others know this is his territory. A man who will openly say he has only one waifu, and her name is Fluttershy. All around a nice dude that takes this too far and smells like a mistake.
Y"ou smell that? Smells like someone left a Jared in the sun "
by Sentientbagel May 7, 2020
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jared vanvleet

A true fuck boy. Normally has a very big head, and a very petite penis. Not to be mistaken for "Jared" Jared VanVleet is a complete douchebag. Also very bad in bed.
You cheated on me, quit being a Jared VanVleet.
by Dictionarywebster June 23, 2016
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Jared

The largest douche bag on the planet. Has both mommy and daddy issues. Fails to comprehend even the most simplistic sentences and ideas. When he speaks everyone who hears it is instantly made dumber. He fails in school, in life, and in every other way possible. He is more unattractive than a $20 dollar a night motel bathroom. He thinks that the world is flat and that science is something you drink. His clothing choices have all the charm of a Klan rally. Jared likes his mom... a little too much. Jared is descended from a long line of complete morons, and he lives up to the standard his ancestors set.
Jared is the douche bag that married dated his mother.
by JimBobCooter1969 February 6, 2019
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