by flex mashing bih March 18, 2021
Get the flex mashingmug. Dude with a slim build who sees himself as more of a Scottiah adonis body god
Usually found peacocking around the floor for no reason
Throws out a random flex when a member of the opposite sex is around
Usually found peacocking around the floor for no reason
Throws out a random flex when a member of the opposite sex is around
by Jonsnowknowsnowt July 27, 2016
Get the Captain Flexmug. Verb - to show off, instill jealousy and a sense of inferiority on others whether intentional or not.
Also, a word to give powerless people the feeling of power by granting them the feeling of being in a higher moral ground of 'humility' (by keeping quiet, most of the time, to protect their own ego in case someone superior makes them feel worse), and hence the perceived moral authority to insinuate people as malicious narcissists regardless of the true intention of the person sharing the experience.
The word is used in both attack (insult) and defense mechanisms.
As an attack, to guilt trip and label a person's action as malicious for making other people around them potentially feel worse about themselves, regardless of the actual intent.
As a defense, to distract a person from the realization of their own inferiority, by insinuating that the other person is a narcissist, thereby shifting the battle from a battle of 'who is skillfully superior' to 'who is morally superior', taking the person using the word from a position of loss due to worse skills, to a winning position by thinking of themselves as humble and non-malicious for keeping quiet.
The word is easy to use, doesn't require high emotional intelligence, and absolves the user of responsibility for causing emotional hurt to the other person they use it on due to the frequency of use in popular culture.
Also, a word to give powerless people the feeling of power by granting them the feeling of being in a higher moral ground of 'humility' (by keeping quiet, most of the time, to protect their own ego in case someone superior makes them feel worse), and hence the perceived moral authority to insinuate people as malicious narcissists regardless of the true intention of the person sharing the experience.
The word is used in both attack (insult) and defense mechanisms.
As an attack, to guilt trip and label a person's action as malicious for making other people around them potentially feel worse about themselves, regardless of the actual intent.
As a defense, to distract a person from the realization of their own inferiority, by insinuating that the other person is a narcissist, thereby shifting the battle from a battle of 'who is skillfully superior' to 'who is morally superior', taking the person using the word from a position of loss due to worse skills, to a winning position by thinking of themselves as humble and non-malicious for keeping quiet.
The word is easy to use, doesn't require high emotional intelligence, and absolves the user of responsibility for causing emotional hurt to the other person they use it on due to the frequency of use in popular culture.
Example 1:
A (Cheerful Person who generally just likes to share things they like, slightly insensitive)
B (Has insecurities about their achievements, often compares themselves to other people)
A: Hey! My Aunt treated us to this nice buffet place last night!
B: Woah... FLEX!
A: How is that flexing?
B: Because we all wanted to go buffet yesterday but we couldn't! Now you made us all feel jealous and poor!
Example 2:
C (Doesn't care what others think, does things on his own and does very well in them)
B (Has insecurities about their achievements, often compares themselves to other people)
C: *Presents the work he's been doing solo on his own for the past 3 months, while everyone else has been slacking*
B: *Whispers to a friend* Oh my god, this is such a market spoiler. Is he trying to flex towards the Professor?
C: *Doesn't actually care what anyone thinks, he just enjoys what he's doing and does very well in it*
A (Cheerful Person who generally just likes to share things they like, slightly insensitive)
B (Has insecurities about their achievements, often compares themselves to other people)
A: Hey! My Aunt treated us to this nice buffet place last night!
B: Woah... FLEX!
A: How is that flexing?
B: Because we all wanted to go buffet yesterday but we couldn't! Now you made us all feel jealous and poor!
Example 2:
C (Doesn't care what others think, does things on his own and does very well in them)
B (Has insecurities about their achievements, often compares themselves to other people)
C: *Presents the work he's been doing solo on his own for the past 3 months, while everyone else has been slacking*
B: *Whispers to a friend* Oh my god, this is such a market spoiler. Is he trying to flex towards the Professor?
C: *Doesn't actually care what anyone thinks, he just enjoys what he's doing and does very well in it*
by jb_c_b May 6, 2021
Get the Flexmug. the act of wrapping your dick and another mans dick together using flex tape and preforming anal sex
John- why would anyone preform a flex tape duo?
John 2- cause that shit water proof
John 3- NOW THAT'S ALOT OF ANAL DAMAGE
John 2- cause that shit water proof
John 3- NOW THAT'S ALOT OF ANAL DAMAGE
by I Eat Ass. August 15, 2018
Get the Flex Tape Duomug. by Potatoepatches August 26, 2019
Get the Flex tapemug. Flex Officer (noun):
An elite-tier desk goblin who lives rent-free under the Captain’s desk, occasionally surfacing to breathe through their nose holes and remind everyone that “they’re special.” Born from the unholy union of nepotism and weaponized whining, the Flex Officer is the workplace equivalent of a trust fund baby who thinks mopping is a hate crime.
They don’t work at the jail — they grace it with their presence.
They don’t get mandated — they get massaged.
Their radio isn’t even connected — it’s just Bluetooth synced to Spotify where they’ve got a playlist titled “Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss.”
Key Attributes:
• Can hold their breath under a desk for 2 hours straight if Daddy Captain is rubbing their back and whispering, “You’re my little soldier.”
• Cries “unfair!” with the power of a soap opera widow anytime someone asks them to… do their actual job.
• Works half a shift, takes a full lunch, and still needs a mental health day from the trauma of watching other people do things.
Hierarchy of Enablers:
• Daddy Captain: Wears khakis so tight you can hear his thighs beg for help. Bends rules like he bends over to scratch the Flex Officer’s belly.
• Mommie Lieutenant: Pretends to discipline but calls them “my baby” when no one’s looking.
• Uncle Lou: Definitely has something sketchy going on!
Fun Fact:
The Flex Officer once got an award for “Most Improved” after showing up to roll call on time… once… in 2019.
An elite-tier desk goblin who lives rent-free under the Captain’s desk, occasionally surfacing to breathe through their nose holes and remind everyone that “they’re special.” Born from the unholy union of nepotism and weaponized whining, the Flex Officer is the workplace equivalent of a trust fund baby who thinks mopping is a hate crime.
They don’t work at the jail — they grace it with their presence.
They don’t get mandated — they get massaged.
Their radio isn’t even connected — it’s just Bluetooth synced to Spotify where they’ve got a playlist titled “Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss.”
Key Attributes:
• Can hold their breath under a desk for 2 hours straight if Daddy Captain is rubbing their back and whispering, “You’re my little soldier.”
• Cries “unfair!” with the power of a soap opera widow anytime someone asks them to… do their actual job.
• Works half a shift, takes a full lunch, and still needs a mental health day from the trauma of watching other people do things.
Hierarchy of Enablers:
• Daddy Captain: Wears khakis so tight you can hear his thighs beg for help. Bends rules like he bends over to scratch the Flex Officer’s belly.
• Mommie Lieutenant: Pretends to discipline but calls them “my baby” when no one’s looking.
• Uncle Lou: Definitely has something sketchy going on!
Fun Fact:
The Flex Officer once got an award for “Most Improved” after showing up to roll call on time… once… in 2019.
You: “Why the hell am I getting mandated again?”
• Sergeant: “Flex Officer said he has emotional allergies to night shift, so Daddy wrote him a note and gave him a juice box.”
• You: aggressively Googling ‘how to fake your own death with minimal paperwork’
• Sergeant: “Flex Officer said he has emotional allergies to night shift, so Daddy wrote him a note and gave him a juice box.”
• You: aggressively Googling ‘how to fake your own death with minimal paperwork’
by BigDaddyBear53 July 4, 2025
Get the Flex Officermug.