Meat Tenderizer

Once commonly used as a kitchen utensil for tenderizing meat, the meat tenderizer now plays a large part in homosexul deviance, and has even become commonly accepted in heterosexual practices. In most cases, a man or woman will repeatedly smash his or her partner's balls, penis or grundle. In some instances, smashing of the clitoris, labia or nose may occur. The use of meat tenderizers during sexual encounters leads to heightened sexual arousal, and is considered a remedy for erectile dysfunction and failing marriages.

Ben: "Tom, why do you have a meat tenderizer hanging up next to your collection of huge double-sided dildos?"

Tom: "Actually, Ben, the meat tenderizer is one of my favorite sex toys. I like it when Gary smashes me in the balls with it and calls me the ugliest trannie he's ever seen. Then he sodomizes me with the back end of it and makes me smell it."

by Frank Giuffrida December 12, 2006

Tender dick

A man who will do shit to in impress a female to get cool points or to try to fuck a female

He's a tender dick ass nigga

by jaydawg0056 January 7, 2022

tender hooks

Firstly, it is tenter hooks, not tender hooks. It means waiting with anxiety. Tenter is a rack for drying cloth and a tenter hook is a nail with an upward curve on which the cloth is hung.

I was on tenter hooks until the test results arrived. Tender hooks do not exist and if they did, they would ne inefective because they are tender.

by Bernie Dworkin August 9, 2009

Tender nuts

Hurting, painful testicles or swollen. When a male is hit in the testicles and his testicles become really tender even the underwear rubbing against them hurt.

Guy 1: Are you going to play soccer or not?
Guy 2: I still have tender nuts from last night!
Guy 1: Oh fuck! She got you good!

by Nobli May 30, 2022

tender bud

An aroused nipple

When I heard about Harry Styles third album coming out, I got a case of tender buds.

by The whole dewniverse March 6, 2022

wiz-tender

A person, usually a nerd, who keeps his piss in a jar in his freezer and sells it to althelets when drug testing comes along. Wiz tenders generally have never gotten a buzz in their life.

Stoner: Shit man, I have to get tested today. I got wasted a few hours ago!
Resourceful Stoner Friend: Why not just go to the wiz-tender. He'll selling for $10 a cup.
Stoner: Great idea! Thank you my resourceful stoner friend!
Resourceful Stoner Friend: Anytime.

by Billy's Dad July 24, 2006

Tender Tendencies

A person who's in his late 30's or 40's that continuously tries to court young ladies ranging in ages 21-27 into going out with him, because he thinks he still has it going on or can't let go of the fact that he is past his prime!

Tim: "Yo man, can someone please tell Mike those young ladies don't want him!" "This is the last time I'm going to the club with him."

Steve: "He defiantly has tender tendencies!"

by EdDeleacroix April 24, 2011