mace spanner

A turd that spans from edge to edge of the toilet and isn’t touching the water. The mace portion of the definition comes from the undigested peanut chunks sticking out the length of the turd!

Honey, get a tape measure so we can measure my mace spanner in the shitter before we chop it up and flush it!

by Cryptic dude December 20, 2017

bent spanner

A bent spanner is a penis that is so long and bent out of shale that a person with a bent spanner can use it to touch their own anal cavity when erect.

My friend has a bent spanner

by Ieatpineapple October 15, 2017

winkle spanner

Someone called Dom who is shit at washing up

Dom you absolute winkle spanner

by AL2001 July 6, 2023

Scran Spanner

Anything that is used to consume one's scran (food). Examples would be: Fork, Knife, Spoon, Chop Sticks

Yo, mate could you pass me a 'Scran Spanner' for my pasta.

by scran'o'clock January 31, 2021

mind spanner

A term used to describe a poor level of workmanship in regard to tightening nuts or other attatchments of that nature.

Person B: "WTF the suspension leg has fallen off?"
Person E: "well its not my fault, i tightened it myself"
Person L: "with what, your fucking mind spanner?"

by Andy Mofflet July 25, 2006

Spanner

i've had two, and i'm 13

it's aw rold record

by ashgdjkhsopdhg October 17, 2003

Spanner Monkey

When someone has been idiotic, foolish, or incredibLy fucking stupid.

"Hey Jim! Wheres my hat?"
"On your head you spanner monkey!!!"

by Jack Skipp February 16, 2004