Vehicular Hypochondria

A mechanical condition where your car leaks fluids, blows smoke, and makes horrible noises...until you take it to the shop and the mechanic can't find anything wrong with your vehicle. After spending $45 an hour for a diagnostic check which revealed nothing, the vehicle runs perfect.

Customer: "The Check-Engine Light and Service Engine Soon Light both came on. I smelled a burning smell, like something electrical. Then there was this grinding noise on the right side."

Mechanic: "I drove it around for 30 minutes and I didn't hear or smell anything. If you notice anything, bring it back and we'll deduct the price of today's service from the repair."

Customer: "I think my car's suffering from Vehicular Hypochondria! I swear it sounded like it was going to die! Now it's perfect. Go figure!"

by Turkey Trot September 26, 2012

Vehicular Imprint

Having a vehicle with the same name ram you from behind

Jeff: Look at this, I had a Chevy HHR rear end the same goddamn vehicle that I have.
Mike: Heh, looks like you got a vehicular imprint stamped right on your ass.

by Jason Jadloski July 13, 2007

Vehicular Munchausen's by proxy

When you are sharing your vehicle with someone and it get damaged in someway (door ding, curb check, scratch, totaled) and you blame it on the person you share with, only to find out later that it was your own fault.

Dick: Great, now my wheel is all chewed up because you curb checked. And I know it was you because it wasn't like that last week, and I certainly didn't do that.
Jane: I haven't used the car in the last two weeks, Dick. I've been in the hospital, Dick.
Dick: Yeah, likely story
*LATER*
Dick: Huh, well, I guess I did that when I drove home drunk and ran over that stop sign.
Jane: Yeah, Dick, we call that vehicular Munchausen's by proxy. No one hurt your fucking BMW but you, Dick.

by lil nugget 360 December 6, 2012

Vehicular Crackicide

A (sometimes) unavoidable traffic situation whereupon a random crackhead wonders in front of one's vehicle causing a an accidental collision (one version of a crackcident)--a collision between a driver and a crackhead, possibly resulting in the injury/death of the aforementioned crackhead and definite damage to one's bumper and/or windshield.

Oh shit! That crackhead stepped off the sidewalk right into my car's path--if I had not swerved aside, I might have committed Vehicular Crackicide!

by DickDaze March 21, 2012

vehicular skunkslaughter

sending a guilty little skunk to oblivion with your car, only to scrape his carcass up off the road later and torch him with a bic in your heady fatty tin foil pipe. if you bring a torched skunk to your local city hall, you will get a hundred dollar reward. kill all skunks

dude, last night i was drunk driving and i committed vehicular skunkslaughter...it was lucky i was just starting to lose my buzz

by Elijah.t May 24, 2012

Vehicular cock block

When there is a row of cars all traveling at the same speed on a highway with no one in front of them while restricting everyone else behind them from moving forwards freely.

Thanks to those inconsiderate barbarians that decided to create a vehicular cock block I ended up missing my flight.

by darkestbeforedawn June 13, 2015

vehicular idiot

1. An idiot that has been conjoined with a vehicle, in some cases by birth.
2. A non-walking, non-stationary idiot.

I'm a walking idiot. What does that even mean, like, I don't think there's like a... what? I don't think there's like a stationary idiot, or like a vehicular idiot, I don't know why I said a walking idiot. I guess I'm just kinda proving my own point here, aren't I, right?

by Zorua 73926 July 28, 2016