Originated when "Can't even function" was mistaked for "Candy Munchin". Means I'm so drunk I can't even function, or too hungover or sick to function.
by usaf8363 January 10, 2011
Are we gonna have a problem?
You got a bone to pick?
You've come so far why now are you pulling on my dick?
I'd normally slap your face off
And everyone here could watch
But I'm feeling nice
Here's some advice
Listen up beeyotch
I like
Lookin' hot
Buying stuff
They can not
I like
Drinking hard
Maxing dad's credit card
I like
Skippin' gym
Scarin' her
Screwin' him
I like
Killer clothes
Kickin' nerds in the nose
If you lack the balls
You can go play dolls
Let your mommy fix you a snack (whoa)
Or you could come smoke
Pound some rum and coke
In my Porsche with the quarterback (whoa, whoa, whoa)
Honey what you waitin' for?
Welcome to my candy store
Time for you to prove you're not a loser
Anymore
And step into my candy store
Guys fall
At your feet
Pay the check
Help you cheat
All you
Have to do
Say goodbye
To Shamu
That freak's
Not your friend
I can tell
In the end
If she
Had your shot
She would leave
You to rot
Course if you don't care
Fine, go braid her hair
Maybe Sesame Street is on (whoa)
Or forget that creep
And get in my jeep
Let's go tear up
Someone's lawn (whoa, whoa, whoa)
Honey what you waitin' for?
Welcome to my candy store
You just gotta prove
You're not a pussy
Anymore
And step into my candy store
You got a bone to pick?
You've come so far why now are you pulling on my dick?
I'd normally slap your face off
And everyone here could watch
But I'm feeling nice
Here's some advice
Listen up beeyotch
I like
Lookin' hot
Buying stuff
They can not
I like
Drinking hard
Maxing dad's credit card
I like
Skippin' gym
Scarin' her
Screwin' him
I like
Killer clothes
Kickin' nerds in the nose
If you lack the balls
You can go play dolls
Let your mommy fix you a snack (whoa)
Or you could come smoke
Pound some rum and coke
In my Porsche with the quarterback (whoa, whoa, whoa)
Honey what you waitin' for?
Welcome to my candy store
Time for you to prove you're not a loser
Anymore
And step into my candy store
Guys fall
At your feet
Pay the check
Help you cheat
All you
Have to do
Say goodbye
To Shamu
That freak's
Not your friend
I can tell
In the end
If she
Had your shot
She would leave
You to rot
Course if you don't care
Fine, go braid her hair
Maybe Sesame Street is on (whoa)
Or forget that creep
And get in my jeep
Let's go tear up
Someone's lawn (whoa, whoa, whoa)
Honey what you waitin' for?
Welcome to my candy store
You just gotta prove
You're not a pussy
Anymore
And step into my candy store
“damn. i wish heather chandler would rail me while singing candy store.”
“WTF DAD YOU’RE SIXTEY-NINE!”
“so?”
“WTF DAD YOU’RE SIXTEY-NINE!”
“so?”
by Anne Boleyn B/Way Simp February 05, 2022
Mythical food others have to eat when they lose at something. Much like humble pie. Derivitive of eat my goal.
I've just shagged that girl you've been trying to score with that bitch for three months. Eat my rainbow candy!!
I just whooped your ass at FIFA, eat my rainbow candy!
I just whooped your ass at FIFA, eat my rainbow candy!
by daywalker stalker November 15, 2009
a sustainable sweet made from upcycled fruits and vegetables. Is utilized as a single delivery item to solve the climate crisis by preventing food waste; the third largest emitter of greenhouse gases. Climate candy is good for people and the planet. Thus making both healthy choices and climate impact more accessible.
by PurePlus November 30, 2021
My dad knows that, when it's that time, and I ask for my period candy, he's gotta go get some Mexican food.
by JBduRune July 18, 2011
the "g" rated version of cock sucker, to be used in casual settings where people dont know what you are actually saying or talking about
by buddmcgreggor March 30, 2010
Unnecessary wrist and/or arm decorations worn by all. Throw back to friendship bracelets. It is recommended to be toppled over watches, chains and other adornments; the more the better.
by Black Mock August 14, 2011