Corporate Tortograph Theory states that in the world of late-stage capitalism, the human impulse for creativity has been channeled so exclusively towards marketing that almost any absurd collection of words, names, or syllables is likely to coenside with a real-world entity, person, or organization of some sort, often in the corporate sphere.
“Jesse, I typed “Gortco” into Google and came up with a page for a random Norwegian company… just another proof for Corporate Tortograph Theory.”
by Galaxy94 June 30, 2023
Get the Corporate Tortograph Theory mug.Corporate bulimia is when companies grow uncontrollably then inevitably layoff people when they miss their growth forecasts. They "binge" via aggressive hiring, acquisitions and mergers, only to then "purge" via planned and unplanned mass layoffs. Results in a perpetually demoralized, depressed and anxious staff of survivors who then repeat the process until eventually the company goes bankrupt or is sold for parts. Rarely a company actually survives this cycle, thereafter attempting to appear healthy to outsiders while employees continue to suffer in silence. The term is an analogy comparing the neurotic growth of companies to the devastating illness bulimia nervosa, an eating disorder. All-too-often found in vainglorious Silicon Valley growth-focused companies.
"Another ten thousand wage slave layoffs were announced today in the latest rounds of corporate bulimia."
by GarethBeaumains August 15, 2023
Get the Corporate bulimia mug.A money-hungry corporation that stopped making good original content years ago and almost exclusively makes shitty live-action remakes of the movies from their glory days, with the exception of a few poorly written sequels of the few tolerable movies they’ve created in the past ten years.
by Peruki November 16, 2023
Get the The Walt Disney Corporation mug.An individual with the work ethic of a warrior in battle. Increases stakeholder value and decreases downtime. Productivity skyrockets and fluctuates time to time. A corporate warrior is defined as a highly valuable asset to a company but highly underpaid in most cases due to many factors but some can make big bucks sticking to it long term or having specific qualifications to begin with.
by Unevenly_balanced May 26, 2024
Get the Corporate Weapon mug.The minimal amount of money you get busting your ass for a large corporation that ultimately gets 99% of the profit without doing any of the work
Dan-Hey you got 200 dollars on your paycheck this week
Steve-Yeah but it’s just corporate crumbs from working 51 hours.
Steve-Yeah but it’s just corporate crumbs from working 51 hours.
by The realest99 August 27, 2018
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