Skip to main content

Corporate Dirtbag

A 9-5 office employee that’s a heavy weed smoker and can still deliver their projects on time. They can go out on the weekdays and will function pretty well at work the next day.
They’ll do shit like work from home but really they’re just checking outlook and teams while on the road somewhere. Or they might be gaming and occasionally asking their boss a random question. Pretty fun person to work with though.
I’m not sure why I tried so hard in college. The people that didn’t try as hard ended up in the same place as I am. It’s my turn to chill. I’m in my corporate dirtbag era.
by portapattie May 9, 2023
mugGet the Corporate Dirtbag mug.

Corporate Baddie

An individual employee at a Fortune 500 company that exceeds the bar within their respective role all while being the baddest bitch in AND outside the office 💅🏾
Dashawn works for a big tech company and is always on his grind. Accolades on accolades left to right! I see him on IG traveling, shaking ass. Ugh such a Corporate Baddie!
by NYC Truth July 28, 2023
mugGet the Corporate Baddie mug.

Corporate Driveby

When someone is so fed up with a company or product they wait until the majority of employees gets off work and then sprays them with bullets comming down the front stairs to replace their staff and solve the problem.
Did you fix the problem with your computer?
No, it's not user error, I'm going to have to do a corporate driveby.
by WGstyles July 29, 2023
mugGet the Corporate Driveby mug.

Corporate bulimia

Corporate bulimia is when companies grow uncontrollably then inevitably layoff people when they miss their growth forecasts. They "binge" via aggressive hiring, acquisitions and mergers, only to then "purge" via planned and unplanned mass layoffs. Results in a perpetually demoralized, depressed and anxious staff of survivors who then repeat the process until eventually the company goes bankrupt or is sold for parts. Rarely a company actually survives this cycle, thereafter attempting to appear healthy to outsiders while employees continue to suffer in silence. The term is an analogy comparing the neurotic growth of companies to the devastating illness bulimia nervosa, an eating disorder. All-too-often found in vainglorious Silicon Valley growth-focused companies.
"Another ten thousand wage slave layoffs were announced today in the latest rounds of corporate bulimia."
by GarethBeaumains August 15, 2023
mugGet the Corporate bulimia mug.

Corporate Circle Jerk

(1) When a company makes a change to its structure, platform, or logo to bandwagon political correctness. This is to virtue signal and/or make good their past misdeeds, but realistically it was all for raising revenue through marketing.
While proclaiming their altruism and stroking their egos, the businessmen at the top stroke something else at a corporate circle jerk knowing fully well that dollar bills are about to rain down on them.

Person 1:

Did you know it's June already?

Person 2:
When did you find out?

Person 1:
All the major brands changed their logos.

Person 2:
*sighs* The corporate circle jerk is upon us.
by Baron von Beuge August 20, 2023
mugGet the Corporate Circle Jerk mug.

Corporate Greed

Sarah: Hey, why is Sm entertainment getting sued?
Karen: Because along with the mistreatment they also refuse to pay their best artists, resulting in corporate greed on their end.
by Beomgyu’s baby mama May 31, 2023
mugGet the Corporate Greed mug.

Corporate humanization

A corporation humanizing itself, usually through social media such as Twitter, to make you think that the corporation is your friend, or at least a person, as opposed to a business built for profit.
all of these brand twitter accounts that have been posting random shit are just examples of how normalized corporate humanization has become in today's world.
by jai_ June 1, 2023
mugGet the Corporate humanization mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email