Do you really

Before I change my mind.
*
Please please be on your way quick, I'm struggling ATM. I need...
*
Please.

At 1 I'm going back inside.
**
Fuck I hope you're on your way I can't stay outside much longer I'm going to be sick.
**
Do you really?
Well, I guess I got my answer... Actions speak louder than words.

Thanks for showing me how much of a fool I am once again... I can't believe how stupid I am to fall for it again.

This fucking hurts so bad, you could've just told me the truth, I'm a big girl I can take it. But no, you had to make me so ecstatic, so excited and happy, and then rip it away and tear my heart out of my chest all over again. What the hell did I do to make you hate me so much that you keep hurting me? Don't worry message received, I'll leave you the fuck alone, you don't have to worry about me bothering you anymore

I love you. I love you too. Do you really or do I just fill a hole in your heart an empty space in your house? /Sobs/

by S.W.A.L.K.J.F.P.J.P. October 13, 2023

Doing the pumpkins

The act, first demonstrated by colonists arriving in 1620 to the New England region, involved the stuffing of the pulp and seeds, found in pumpkins, into both the vaginal canal and rectum of women to block evil spirits thought to attack a woman's womb, beginning on the night of October 28th.

After a fortnight, children were assigned to a woman of the village and would slowly begin to remove bits of the pulp and seeds, little by little, from both her rectum and vaginal canal. Upon the child removing all of the pumpkin pulp from both cavities, which was a rather tedious, but, overall, engaging event for the whole onlooking village, they'd yell out the emphatic line in their triumph.

'Thou holes may be foul and rich in ferment, but no evil spirit shall have my newly claimed festive bit of nourishment! Whether sweet or sour, if it takes me more than an hour, no seeds there shall be, as you can now see, two gaping holes abound, we can now share in glee, feast we will on the plunder, evil spirits have met their thunder.'

So, 'doing the pumpkins' referred to a lovely gathering and seasonal time of fellowship, the first known reference of a DP, a rather ironic deviance from traditional Puritan values of chastity, loyalty, and resisting temptations of the flesh, as well as the embracing of food fetishes and butt play.

In one month's time, we will be once again 'doing the pumpkins' and having such a joyous time together as we ban the evil spirits with each little pulp string and seed we find, no matter how deep or rank. Autumn is here!

When I'm doing my pumpkins, I wonder if it's the lady Catherine Hawthorne that I'll get to double stuff. She won the Scarlet Number pageant this year. I heard that her parts will make a pumpkin meal especially putrid and easy to remove. What is gone in longer searching, becomes a rich, liquid gold, with the aroma of stale muskox urine.

by ChileanSeaBass2023 October 13, 2023

Who Do You Voodoo, Bitch?

the song from dead island that goes like

"Ha ha ha, you ain't scared. Yet. Things that go bump in the night. Me, Sam B. Heh.

Shrunken heads, broken legs, body parts on the concrete
Cut 'em up butcher style, gators in the swamp
Red light, leave 'em dead, runnin' like a track meet
Scared of nobody, what you motherfuckers want?
Believe me when I tell 'em I'm a boogeyman beast
Leave 'em slashed from they head to they feet
Pin pricks to the chest of a bitch well earned
Cookin' meat, cannibal tryna eat

I got a zombie army and you can't harm me
Who do you voodoo, bitch?
Drink blood like a vampire without warnin'
Who do you voodoo, bitch? Stand up!
Sam B got the thing that go bump in the night

I can say the rest but its too long

Guy: Heard of Who Do You Voodoo, Bitch?

Dead island hater: Is it from the shitty zombie game with a trailer with no gameplay?

Guy:*Laughs in rage mode*

BREAKING NEWS! DEAD ISLAND FANATIC FOUND DEAD! IF YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION ON THE KILLER, REPORT IT NOW!

by diet dying light October 13, 2023

do it if you’re bad

a way to convince your friends to do something. claiming they are ‘bad’ if they do it

‘no i can’t do that!’
‘why not, do it if you’re bad’

by helllllooooooo October 16, 2023

doing a Clarke

when someone keeps disappearing from there desk at work, even when its beyond busy.

where's Paul, oh he's probably doing a Clarke

by arnoldp123 October 18, 2023

You can’t be doing this shit on 1.5

Any other priorities are irrelevant when it comes to ark 1.5 . No job , no gym , no bitches, no social life . Nothing 1.5 and 1.5 only .

Joe: Hey John! Just woke up out of a coma after being hit by a transport truck going 120 on the highway while crossing the freeway trying to grab some snacks . I’m currently paralyzed from the neck down I cannot use any part of my body not even my hands I’m completly comatose.

John: Don’t care cunt you can’t be doing this shit on 1.5 …

by Wende October 19, 2023

Spin do Costa

Spin do Costa, é o nome que se dá quando se faz um spin numa slot machine cujo o seu valor é 125€.

A referencia Costa, pertence ao primeiro-ministro português António Costa que em Setembro de 2022 anunciou uma ajuda extraordinária de 125€ aos portugueses que trabalham ou pessoas que recebam subsídios seja por desemprego, invalidez, etc..

Vou dar um Spin do Costa!

Faz aí um Spin do Costa a ver se forra!

by apolozera October 22, 2023