You’re a girl, and you’re dating a boy. You cheat on him, you push him out of bed, you slap him in the face, etc. and in return, you notice he starts acting different that night. He pronounces his R’s like W’s, he colors on an app you’ve never seen him play, his voice is as high pitched as he can arrange it to be, and he uses quotes from his ex and his intended in-laws in conversation when it doesn’t even make sense. He copes, in absurdity and idiosyncratic amusement, by doing his best impression of his first girlfriend, the one he calls “The Sword”. You fall asleep thereafter.
Then, like a phantom, he escapes in the night, and listens to the old songs, and drives in the old way, down the kingsroad, and you never see him again. For only the one that came before you, all of you, offered him up the peace, and the comfort, and the love, to truly rest. You asked about her, once and never again, after noticing his enthusiasm and nostalgia, as if it were 50 years ago. And your decision to betray him brought upon your worst enemy. And this confusion you experienced and verbalized is what it means to have the curse of the blade.
Then, like a phantom, he escapes in the night, and listens to the old songs, and drives in the old way, down the kingsroad, and you never see him again. For only the one that came before you, all of you, offered him up the peace, and the comfort, and the love, to truly rest. You asked about her, once and never again, after noticing his enthusiasm and nostalgia, as if it were 50 years ago. And your decision to betray him brought upon your worst enemy. And this confusion you experienced and verbalized is what it means to have the curse of the blade.
Usurper: “Vance you are so fucking dumb it’s not even funny”
Sticky Vicky: “You’re not dumb, you’re perfect”
Usurper: “uhh I wasn’t talking about myself you fucking idiot.”
Sticky Vicky: “okay get into it I guess”
Usurper: “UHH YEAH WE WILL FUCKING GET INTO IT, YOU ARE PISSING ME THE FUCK OFF
Sticky Vicky: “But I was just twying to hewlp…
Usurper: “Whatever…I’m going to bed” (CURSE OF THE BLADE).
*Sticky Vicky Von Vanimal leaves the usurper, and she is blocked, baleeted, and BTFO’d before his car even starts. And when he yearns for her, it is “Drugs” by lil Aaron, or Tate McRae, or cupcakke. And when he yearns for his younger self, it is Slayer, or Priest, or Pink Tape by lil uzi vert. And when it’s both, it is “Drunk in Love” by Beyoncé, or “Baby I need Your Loving’” by Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell, and several songs he has heard at his nursing home job for the last 5 years. Either way, it is on full volume. a concert, really, taking him home. And it is always, always, his favorite moment, in any of the relationships that have come after the one he calls “the sword.” Finally, the pretending is over with, and full attention and respect is paid to the way things once were, without turmoil, or guilt, or the dreading of a future with someone he doesn’t love.*
Sticky Vicky: “You’re not dumb, you’re perfect”
Usurper: “uhh I wasn’t talking about myself you fucking idiot.”
Sticky Vicky: “okay get into it I guess”
Usurper: “UHH YEAH WE WILL FUCKING GET INTO IT, YOU ARE PISSING ME THE FUCK OFF
Sticky Vicky: “But I was just twying to hewlp…
Usurper: “Whatever…I’m going to bed” (CURSE OF THE BLADE).
*Sticky Vicky Von Vanimal leaves the usurper, and she is blocked, baleeted, and BTFO’d before his car even starts. And when he yearns for her, it is “Drugs” by lil Aaron, or Tate McRae, or cupcakke. And when he yearns for his younger self, it is Slayer, or Priest, or Pink Tape by lil uzi vert. And when it’s both, it is “Drunk in Love” by Beyoncé, or “Baby I need Your Loving’” by Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell, and several songs he has heard at his nursing home job for the last 5 years. Either way, it is on full volume. a concert, really, taking him home. And it is always, always, his favorite moment, in any of the relationships that have come after the one he calls “the sword.” Finally, the pretending is over with, and full attention and respect is paid to the way things once were, without turmoil, or guilt, or the dreading of a future with someone he doesn’t love.*
by Captain Cream Soda May 26, 2025
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The most egregious experience when planning hangouts with friends. When life takes a complete 180 degrees and totally voids all of your pre-planning when setting up a hangout. The intended day was determined to be bright, cool, and clear. However, the day of everything goes to shit and it starts raining, hailing, and 15 tornados take out your favorite restaurant.
The most egregious experience when planning hangouts with friends. When life takes a complete 180 degrees and totally voids all of your pre-planning when setting up a hangout. The intended day was determined to be bright, cool, and clear. However, the day of everything goes to shit and it starts raining, hailing, and 15 tornados take out your favorite restaurant.
Person A: HOLY FUCK I THOUGHT YOU CHECKED THE WEATHER BEFORE HAND?!
Person B: T_T *sobbing* i did it was clearrrrr last night when i looked at the weather app
Person A: *sigh* its all because of The Danny Hangout Curse™
Person B: T_T *sobbing* i did it was clearrrrr last night when i looked at the weather app
Person A: *sigh* its all because of The Danny Hangout Curse™
by kalalalalalalalalala February 23, 2025
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Get the Curse Of The Console mug.Person 1: “Thank god she didn’t turn into a loli”
Person 2: WHAT HAVE YOU DONE MIKEY’S CURSE IS BACK
Person 2: WHAT HAVE YOU DONE MIKEY’S CURSE IS BACK
by Onira April 7, 2024
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Get the Dewberts Curse mug.When you lose your virginity to someone and are then obsessed and think youre in love with them. If you date them you will be obsessed with them but often its not reciprocated if they were not a virgin when you shagged.
by grumplip June 6, 2024
Get the virgins curse mug.A person with Cupid's curse usually has no problem with people liking them but as soon as they catch feelings the same person who liked them first instantly looses feelings.
"Every time someone likes me and I feel the same they always loose feelings!"
"Dude you have Cupid's curse"
"Dude you have Cupid's curse"
by Blaze woods November 7, 2022
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