Why I don't trust the Bible

Holy shit, it's like watching Jesus get flogged! That was brutal! That whole debate was just brutal!
Hym "Except I don't think I'd actually laugh at the sight of Jesus getting flogged. I might masterbate though, bah dum ts! Sad wank for Jesus! Why I don't trust the bible? More like 'why you don't want the sauce!' Got this nigga lookin like he never even SEEN a book!"
by Hym Iam June 19, 2024
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Bible thumper

Bible Thumper: one who talks to others regarding the Bible and Jesus trying to have them accept Jesus as their Saviour.
Bible thumper Don came around again today, still trying to get me to accept Jesus Christ as my Saviour.
by Brother Donald June 16, 2022
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Bible Thumper

A religious hypocrite whom often lashes out against others for how they live their lives but get angered if somebody else does the same. They often use biblical scriptures to justify their judgmental hypocrisy.
I remember a Bible thumper got on my case just because I like watching "Empire" on Fox & they told me how much I was bound to be sent to Hell just for liking the show.
by MASTUH OSCG 8845 IS BACK September 03, 2022
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Desert bible

Another name for the Quran.
Eddie: "I heard Joe now reads the desert bible instead of the original."
Billie: "Great, should we buy him a rug he can pray to?"
by Blasfemy March 18, 2024
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Bible

One of the ways our government delegates population control. There are many banned books on "discipline" in reality they're ways to abuse the shit out of your children but even if the parents figure it out there is always one book that never leaves: "the-Bible."
Jimmy is so screwed up he can't have children because of his dysfunctional upbringing in the Bible and other banned books on abusing kids with "structured discipline".
by Dixie's finest November 23, 2022
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Bible

A book that explains how to sexually abuse a child and get away with it.
Can you pass me the Bible. I’m gonna need it this Sunday.
by JesusChrist/God January 18, 2023
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bible

Synonym for “fr
“Omg Khloe is losing so much weight
Bible
by treetreetree March 25, 2022
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