An obscure sexual act between distance lovers, so named after the lengthy and distant span of Canada's history. Two people using computer technology, or phones if you must, lie nude in a self-dug ditch, preferably in the woods, that has been well-urinated in. The technology is to maintain audio and/or video communication between the two lovers. While discussing the mating habits of woodland creatures, the couple masturbates furiously until achieving orgasm, at which moment they are to leap out of the hole and climb the nearest tree to its top. While the adrenaline is still fresh and powerful (like the urine) from the act, the lovers take a deep, slow breath from atop the tree. This links the post-coitus mates together through the power of nature, which smells and tastes like Canada's History.
When Johnny and Sally were apart, attending college in different states, they maintained their amorous attitudes toward each other by sharing Canada's History once or twice a week.
by Hans Van Dingo February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. When you perform a Boston Pancake, wrap the pancake around a sexual toy, freeze it, then insert it into a relative's sexual orifice. You must create a drilling motion with the toy and you must wear a Bigfoot suit.
Steve - "Wow did you see that Canada's History John gave to Mom yesterday?"
Jill - "Yea, I did! You know, I wanted to be her first, dang!"
Jill - "Yea, I did! You know, I wanted to be her first, dang!"
by CRich_ February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. The most repulsive sex act known to mankind, involving moose antlers, a jug of maple syrup, and the Stanley Cup.
1. Don't be a Noob, remember the lube!
2. Fill up woman with maple syrup by use of anal beer bong.
3. Store Stanley Cup in male's rectum
4. Woman must spray maple syrup from butt into Stanley Cup in the man's rectum.
5. Hollow out antlers to function as "crazy-fun-straw" to drink maple syrup from man's rectum.
6. Rinse, repeat, maybe switching gender roles.
7. Proceed to make sensitive, passionate love.
1. Don't be a Noob, remember the lube!
2. Fill up woman with maple syrup by use of anal beer bong.
3. Store Stanley Cup in male's rectum
4. Woman must spray maple syrup from butt into Stanley Cup in the man's rectum.
5. Hollow out antlers to function as "crazy-fun-straw" to drink maple syrup from man's rectum.
6. Rinse, repeat, maybe switching gender roles.
7. Proceed to make sensitive, passionate love.
"Could you help me with the groceries, honey? I'm a little sore from when Condoleeza Rice gave me an in-depth reenaction of Canada's History yesterday."
"Sure, okay Dad..."
"Sure, okay Dad..."
by KT151LN February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. The sexual act of inserting a moose antler into a beaver on the back of a Royal Canadian Mounted Police constable during the Stanley Cup challenge. A mooseknuckle can be substituted if it's another Wings/Penguins matchup, and the antler may be inserted in Stephen Harper on Boxing Day or Stephen Colbert in the Vancouver Olympics.
by lionscorp February 5, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. A grotesque sexual act where the snow of an igloo and the feces of a polar bear is shoved into the rectum of a female. Moose feces can also be used.
by ultradowney February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. by tycoonius February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. The act of covering your sexual partner's body with maple syrup while wearing moose antler hats and inserting the Stanley Cup into as many orifices as possible
by Samsara22 February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug.