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Dick douche canoe

Karen was being a dick douche canoe and driving in the left lane.
by Willie June 11, 2021
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Douche Canoe

A pussified person lacking any sort of balls to get a job done.
That douche canoe needs to fucking punch the gas and get the fuck out of my way.
by PRINCESS PHROGG June 17, 2021
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Canoe Lesbian

A Canoe Lesbian is one of only two types of lesbians. This lesbian will go out of nowhere and cut a tree down and make a canoe out of it. This canoe will sit in a room for over a month and collect dust, waiting for its lesbian to ride it hard one day!
Fred turns to his friend and asks, "Yo, bro, I didn't know Lola was lesbian."
His friend Gary turns to him and pauses from giving his girlfriend sweaty backshots, "Yeah, bro; she's like totally a Canoe Lesbian."
Fred, "A canoe lesbian?"
Gary's girlfriend huffs from below Gary, "Yeah, she just like took an axe to a tree one day and built a canoe."
Gary: "Yeah, bro, up and nowhere, too. It's like she just snapped after she scissored Mary." Gary flips his girlfriend around and starts pounding her from the front.
Fred shrugs as he watches them from the couch, "Damn, I didn't know there were different types of lesbians. That's wild, and it's good for her, I guess. What's she going to do with the canoe?"
Gary groans as his girlfriend moans, "Yeah, I don't know. I guess it will just collect dust until she decides to ride it out hard one day!" Gary thrusts one more time and slumps next to his girlfriend, breathing hard, his cock throbbing and empty.
Fred, unfazed, just stares at the picture of Lola on his phone as he reaches for his zipper, "Damn, unfortunate for the canoe."
by freaksters October 15, 2024
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canoeing

when smoking a joint or blunt and it only burns on the inside of the paper, but somehow leaving most of the paper unburnt, this can be fixed by burning the excess paper.

this can also be used as another word for ‘sideburn’ which is when a joint or blunt only burns on one side, you can fix this with saliva or by burning off the excess.
man this joint is canoeing!
by shrekonice69 June 19, 2025
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Ethiopian Canoe

A typical black pocket comb with no handle turned upside down.
Dude, your bed head is out of control! You can use my Ethiopian Canoe.
by Pudd of Rudd June 21, 2025
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Douche Canoe

A person, usually male, who you wish would row, row, row the fuck away from you.
OMG he is being so obnoxious for no reason, like first he is all nice and I think we will be friends, but now he is just being a douche canoe.
by adidasDUDE August 30, 2025
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Douche Canoe

Douche Canoe (noun): A self-absorbed, obnoxious individual who drifts through life on a raft of arrogance, bad takes, and an utter lack of self-awareness. Often mistaken for a human, but upon closer inspection, closely resembles a sentient, poorly groomed toe with an attitude problem because he likely sat on a pinecone.
Example: Kyle, the human embodiment of a stubbed toe, leaned back in his chair, manspreading like he was claiming land, and loudly explaining why everyone else was wrong about literally everything. Between flexing his "elite genetics" (despite looking like a swollen big toe) and hitting on anything that moved, he remained blissfully unaware that the entire room was desperately hoping for a strong gust of wind to carry his douche canoe far, far away.
by Sassenach March 14, 2025
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