Sonic hand job

The act of masturbating to another male while watching hedgehog porn video while siting on a bunch of hedgehogs. You must do this act at the speed of sound, if somone caught you, you will have to scream pingus!

I will give you a sonic hand job and you will LIKE IT!

by Mexican geek January 21, 2018

Hobo hand race

Paying homeless people to jerk off in a race to finish first

Tim paid two homeless dudes Lee and Shawn $20 each to see who could cum first winning the hobo hand race

by Cumguzzler92648 March 1, 2025

Cold hands

Being rusty or having a bad day when playing sports or video games.

"My aim is off because I have cold hands"

by 0hcard October 1, 2022

hand biscuit

When you fart into your hand and release it unexpectedly in someone’s face. Also known as palm balm

While Heather was at her desk working, I did a drive by and delivered her a hand biscuit.

by Handbiscuit February 22, 2023

Monkey hand

An I.T. wizard's doer of his/her bidding in the context of getting things done without the need to engage with the great unwashed masses.

No need to ever go out, between Amazon, Uber Eats and my trusty monkey hand, I don't need to go anywhere til the next Brony meet.

by Buttwaddington November 22, 2021

second-hand sugar

benefits that a person derives from a friend who has a sugar daddy

Andrea: Where did Mary get that purse? I though Brena was the one with a sugar daddy...
Jess: Yeah, but Brena is always passing along the gifts and taking friends on free trips. It's second-hand sugar.

by aep90 September 10, 2020

One-hand tuck

Similar to the penis tuck. The swift tuck you do with your left (or non-dominant hand, leaving dominant hand to shake hands) when you're in public, standing up and have a visible erection.

Typically, thumb (under clothes) at the base of the erect penis and fingers at the head of the penis (over clothes). Then, push wrist down and fingers up. This results in the penis being tucked under the elastic strap of briefs or any such equivalent.

When done in one swift movement (that takes years to master) it appears that you are simply adjusting your pants/getting comfortable/scratching. This can be embarrassing but is better than the visibly erect alternative.

Co-worker: "Have you seen the bosses new secretary? She's fucking hot."

Me: "Yeah. When bossman went to introduce us I got so hard I had to perform the one-hand tuck."

by OstracizedElite May 23, 2015