how to kill your legs

to much weight on the legs

how to kill your legs is by lifting a real heavy box

by shelden January 21, 2010

How i met your mother

the biggest cock tease show of all time

Jared: OMG did you see How i met your mother last night? SOO good, we almost found out who the mother was.!!!!

Nick: No its such a cock tease, i have a life

by Steven Lei May 25, 2010

How to kill yourself

hey...please don't search this up...life can be bad but i will always be there for you, i will never give up on you, i love you so much, your life is the most precious thing in the entire universe, you are amazing in every way,

I'm here, i care for you, no matter what, no matter who you are, i will love you forever

116 123
I will always be right by your side
you're never alone
Please dont google How to kill yourself
you're so special to me

i love you <3

by OhGodPleaseKillMe December 26, 2022

how big is your macbook?

how big is your penis?

Hey dude how big is your macbook? Mine is like a 17 inch.

by dankfooty January 15, 2011

How old is your newspaper?

A substitution for ' You are sooo~ left out.", to tell someone that what they were saying was old news.

Henry: "Hey, I heard Mark is going out with Cathy. Is it real?"
Rick: "Dude. How old is your newspaper? That's 3 months ago. He's going out with his side chick Sabrina now."

by hugalahugalalolo777 March 6, 2016

How to make yourself attractive to women

You want to know? Since men apparently don’t know I will teach you.

Hym “You want to know how to make yourself attractive to women? Here’s what you do: make $100,000 or more a year (or have parents who make that much) OR have a fat cock (Ideally both. BOTH is LITERALLY the ideal). Now, you could say ‘Well, studies show that *blah blah blah*’ but the studies don’t account for the outliers and this does. List all of the qualities you think women are attracted to. Will women select outside of those qualities for a man with a fat cock or $100,000+ a year? Yes. Which is why you see men who don’t meet the criteria that is supposedly required to attract women still attracting women. It’s why you need to rely on the caveat of ‘short term vs long term’ selection. Fat cocks and money.”

by Hym Iam October 16, 2022

How I met your Mother

A really really really REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY long sitcom about how some random kids listen to how their father met their mother. OR
A really long lecture cause you got in trouble and got caught doing something bad in the bathroom (next time, close the door and lock it)

Kids ima tell u How I met your Mother
Kids: Okay fine i broke a window...

by SomRandumdude January 5, 2023