James Beruldson (n.) — ˈdʒeɪmz bɛr-ʊld-sən
“A gay person whose desire is not directed toward youthful beauty nor the ordinary middle-aged bore, but toward men of seventy-eight years and upward, belongs to a peculiar class of aesthetic opportunists. They are not, as they often imagine, admirers of wisdom or connoisseurs of experience, but rather collectors of decay, enamored with the very patina of mortality. One might compare them to Elton John’s fondness for sequins and spectacle: dazzling in appearance, but absurd upon closer examination. They tend to justify their predilection with talk of ‘maturity,’ ‘gentlemanly grace,’ or ‘old-world charm,’ yet anyone with eyes can see the fascination is with the wrinkles, the liver spots, and the trembling hands clutching at relevance. To them, the scent of mothballs is not repellent, but intoxicating. To others, this preference looks less like refined taste and more like a hobbyist’s obsession—akin to stamp-collecting, except the stamps cough, wheeze, and require walking sticks. In short, the Beruldsonian type of homosexual is marked by a willful rejection of vitality in favor of decrepitude, a perversity which, though baffling, has somehow endured in polite society without the ridicule it so richly deserves.”
“A gay person whose desire is not directed toward youthful beauty nor the ordinary middle-aged bore, but toward men of seventy-eight years and upward, belongs to a peculiar class of aesthetic opportunists. They are not, as they often imagine, admirers of wisdom or connoisseurs of experience, but rather collectors of decay, enamored with the very patina of mortality. One might compare them to Elton John’s fondness for sequins and spectacle: dazzling in appearance, but absurd upon closer examination. They tend to justify their predilection with talk of ‘maturity,’ ‘gentlemanly grace,’ or ‘old-world charm,’ yet anyone with eyes can see the fascination is with the wrinkles, the liver spots, and the trembling hands clutching at relevance. To them, the scent of mothballs is not repellent, but intoxicating. To others, this preference looks less like refined taste and more like a hobbyist’s obsession—akin to stamp-collecting, except the stamps cough, wheeze, and require walking sticks. In short, the Beruldsonian type of homosexual is marked by a willful rejection of vitality in favor of decrepitude, a perversity which, though baffling, has somehow endured in polite society without the ridicule it so richly deserves.”
by jimmobobfreyo31 August 27, 2025
Get the James Beruldsonmug. "My shitty manager just scheduled me for two 8 hours shifts, both closing this weekend!"
"You, my friend, have a James."
"You, my friend, have a James."
by 1NF1N1TY1! June 24, 2021
Get the Jamesmug. Boy oh boy where do I even begin Lebron honey my pookie bear I have loved you ever since I first laid eyes on you The way you drive into the paint and strike fear into your enemies eyes Your silky smooth touch around the rim and that gorgeous jumpshot I would do anything for you I wish it were possible to freeze time so I would never have to watch you retire You had a rough childhood but you never gave up hope You are even amazing off the court, youre a great husband and father sometimes I even call you dad I forvever dread and weep, thinking of the day you will one day retire I would sacrifice my own life it were the only thing that could put a smile on your beautiful face You have given me so much joy and heartbreak over the years I remember when you first left Cleveland and its like my heart got broken into a million pieces But a tear still fell from my right eye when I watched you win your first ring in miami, because deep down my glorious king deserved it I just wanted you to return home Then alas you did my sweet baby boy came home and I rejoiced 2015 was a hard year for us baby but in 2016 you made history happen You came back from 3-1 and I couldn't believe it I was crying bawling even, and I heard my glorious king exclaim these words
"CLEVELAND, THIS IS FOR YOU!" Not only have you changed the game of basketball and the world forever but youve eternally changed my world And now you're getting older, but still the goat, my goat I love you pookie bear, my glorious king
"CLEVELAND, THIS IS FOR YOU!" Not only have you changed the game of basketball and the world forever but youve eternally changed my world And now you're getting older, but still the goat, my goat I love you pookie bear, my glorious king
by LebronGlazer2903 June 2, 2024
Get the LeBron Jamesmug. by Flenderbeak December 6, 2023
Get the Jamesmug. by Joint-boy May 26, 2022
Get the James Boxmug. James is hands down one of the sexiest and smartest boys I know. I may have only been friends with him for months but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t falling in love. James is a badass boy who brings a smile to your face just looking at the guy like WHAT?! This man is the sun of my life. You’d would be so lucky to have him as a boyfriend he will have u begging for “special treatment 😏” (if u know YA KNOW). Either way I love my James 🥺❤️
by Bri_cutie August 23, 2023
Get the James Iurvinmug. A James Kellow (or JK) is a Hardcore MF. Basically coolest dude you can meet. Other guys are reaching to be him.
by Hater69intotheBBW September 17, 2020
Get the James Kellowmug.