one handed twister

Jerking off preferably in a twisting motion

He was giving himself a one handed twister in the bathroom

by frankiepolymath March 8, 2015

blizzard hands

a person who is unable to perform simple work-related tasks. They perform their job as well as they would if they had two DQ Blizzards stuck to their hands. a lazy, unreliable employee.

Man, Sally didn't sign off on the tasks she completed. What a blizzard hands!

Dang it, Henry couldn't even do his assigned work today. That guy is a real blizzard hands.

by TBell Bonus April 17, 2015

Hand Herpes

When someone has a sexual herpes on their hand that they got from sexual activity or from a red marker

OMG that Butch witch has hand herpes

by mrstealyobish69 April 26, 2015

Playing Hands

When a couple is constantly putting their hands on each other, sexually and otherwise, in enclosed public spaces.

Tom: I gave my brother and his girl a ride to the movies yesterday, but they kept playing hands in my backseat.
Dick: Dude, they ever heard of too much PDA?

by JasonD May 4, 2015

Texting hand

You're dominate texting hand. The one that you use more frequently. Mostly your dominate hand too.

My left hand feels awkward with my phone in it so I use my texting hand when I'm laying down.

by Kennedy529 May 10, 2015

shake hands with the boss

To urinate (male, semi-vulgar)

I'll be back in a minute, I'm going to go shake hands with the boss. *heads off to bathroom*

by Dr Akula May 18, 2015

One-hand tuck

Similar to the penis tuck. The swift tuck you do with your left (or non-dominant hand, leaving dominant hand to shake hands) when you're in public, standing up and have a visible erection.

Typically, thumb (under clothes) at the base of the erect penis and fingers at the head of the penis (over clothes). Then, push wrist down and fingers up. This results in the penis being tucked under the elastic strap of briefs or any such equivalent.

When done in one swift movement (that takes years to master) it appears that you are simply adjusting your pants/getting comfortable/scratching. This can be embarrassing but is better than the visibly erect alternative.

Co-worker: "Have you seen the bosses new secretary? She's fucking hot."

Me: "Yeah. When bossman went to introduce us I got so hard I had to perform the one-hand tuck."

by OstracizedElite May 23, 2015