Gateway Metal

Much like gateway drugs, it’s the softer entry level metal you listen to before getting into harder, heavier metal. -Steven Jessup

Linkin Park was my Gateway Metal band before I started listening to Slipknot.

by JekkylJack June 7, 2025

r/metalmemes

A subreddit that hates on listenable metal while they listen to a band thats named “Deathcum sacrifice of satans bussy while a cult does a vocal ritual which involves putting magma on their throat so it sounds more metal” and their songs are named like satanic chant in a prehistoric language while their songs sound like the screechers (vocalist) head is getting bashed with a metal drumstick and has a logo that looks like a splattered, sentient, dying turd on a wall

r/metalmemes poser: hey bro, what bands do u listen to??
Chad metal enjoyer: Huh, maybe Sabaton or Slipknot
r/metalmemes poser: EWWWWW WHY DONT YOU LISTEN TO SACRIFICIAL BLOOD OF THE ULTIMATE CREATURE
Chad based metal fan: No

by my latest post isnt ragebait June 7, 2025

r/metalmemes

A subreddit filled with metal elitists that say sabaton or gloryhammer arent good bands or isnt even metal when they listen to some band with 3 monthly listeners called “Sacrificial blood cum of Satans pussy with blood dripping on his door while a satanic cult goes into a forest and do ritualistic sacrifices by making their vocal cords sound like the gates of hell themselves” with an unreadable logo which looks like a piss shit splatter on a burning fetus while he hes accompanied with a sentient, dying, turd, while their music sounds like a jammed chainsaw with a dudes head getting repeatedly beat while the singer is some dudes vocal cords getting burned using hot magma.

Their song titles are named after a satanic chanting in a long gone dead ancient language, and the lyrics are extended versions of those chants that summons 9 demons, and makes your furniture float while trying to recite their songs.

r/metalmemes poser: hey bro, what bands do u listen to??
Chad based metal enjoyer: Huh, maybe Sabaton, Detus or Slipknot
r/metalmemes poser: EWWWWW WHY DONT YOU LISTEN TO SACRIFICIAL BLOOD CUM OF SATANS CHILD WHILE A SATANIC CULT GOES INTO A FOREST AND DO RITUALISTIC SACRIFICES BY MAKING THEIR VOCAL CORDS SOUND LIKE THE GATES OF HELL THEMSELVES???
Chad based metal enjoyer: Poser.

by my latest post isnt ragebait June 25, 2025

Joke Metal

A sub-genre of metal music characterised by whimsical performances/gimmicks/lyrics designed to enhance a band's "shock value" and "approachability". Examples include babymetal, okilly dokilly, Belushi speedball and psychostik

Man, I really fancy having a good time and going to see a joke metal band

by ToneDeafJoe July 5, 2025

Kafkaesque metawhorephosis

When you feel like a fucking praying mantis or grey alien because you transformed into jerking champion after seeing too much existential crisis to cope you transform into a whore you need dat cat eraday or you cannot function to compensate.

After seeing too many war stories I had a kafkaesque metawhorephosis that made me jork it eraday.

by Daaaaaaa wzzzzzzziard July 5, 2025

Douche Metal Dork

An idiot who thinks Metallica is the best metal band ever, who's politics change like a babies underwear and purchases metal paraphernalia to justify his existence.

What a douche metal dork, everything is metal or nothing. Secretly rubs his Hulk Hogan WWF action figure inappropriately on very appropriate areas.

by Powdered Douche Nut July 9, 2025

ranch metaphor

when youtuber daniel howell from dan and phil compared himself and other youtuber amazingphil to ranch during their second "massive pizza mukbang". he said that they were put on earth for the sole purpose of finding each other, just as the ingredients of ranch were put on earth for the sole purpose of creating ranch.

We were meant to find each other and create something beautiful, just like the ingredients of ranch.

We're totally a ranch metaphor.

by jayjaylolllll July 19, 2025