KAI(Kinda Always Insane) Syndrome

The KAI(Kinda Always Insane) syndrome is extremely common amongst high school and middle school students around the world. It is commonly found amongst students in the IB curriculum however it has been proven that anyone can be diagnosed with this syndrome. The KAI Syndrome is generally a behavioral syndrome in which a student is obsessed with achieving high grades. This obsession can result in lack of sleep, extreme stress, and violent hitting.

Symptoms Include:

1. Rapid and Random Jumping
2. Rapid Blinking
3. Violent hitting
4. Constant Sleep Deprival

5. Headaches
6. A voice in your head saying you're not good enough
7. Constantly restarting projects
8. Regular Allnighters
9. Randomly screaming "Work!"
10. Randomly laughing
11. Cramming literally everything till the last millisecond
12. Freaking out at literally everything
13. Immense competitiveness
14. Debating with teachers for scores
15. Paranoia with classmates
16. Anger at unproductivity
17. Depression
18. Emotionally detached

Treatments include:
1. Sleeping
2. Not giving a shit
3. Accepting you're not good enough
4. Studies have shown baking surprisingly helps

*Kai walks into his classroom in the morning, his eyes have bags, he looks extremely unhealthy.
Leo: Woah man you don't look that good. What happened
Kai: I restarted my history project and didn't sleep.
Leo: Why? You already finished that a week ago?
Kai: Ya, but it was so crap.
Leo: Okay man. Suit yourself
Kai: We need to start our math project
Leo: That's due next month
*Kai begins to blink rapidly, and jumps up and down, and hits Leo violently
Kai: WORK! WORK! WORK!
Leo: Woah man! Ouch! Ouch! Have you been checked for KAI(Kinda Always Insane) Syndrome?

by Ovendid April 11, 2019

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