Tard Guard

Slang for a special education teacher

Person: Look at the tard guard over there.

by JackAttack1U November 19, 2024

color guard hoe

a bitch that does not shut the fuck up about their winterguard/colorguard season. also known as me.

Hey we got first place at our show last weekend!
No one fucking asked, god you’re such a color guard hoe.

by c4an November 4, 2022

Fear of life guards

Lifeguphobia, the fear of teenagers who scream, whistle at you and ruin your fun during the funnest time of the year ( fear of lifeguards )

Sally had lifeguphobia fear of life guards , so we had to go to a public pool

by Gabriella colon January 23, 2023

Joint Guard

The person in the group that is designated to hold the weed whilst the group is moving areas. Usually a dumber person, such as certain jocks or the distant friends.

Brian is so weird, the only reason we keep him around is to be the Joint Guard .

by Evan_Dayhoff March 17, 2018

Old Guard

The people that saw you through the murky middle. You might not have known them in the beginning, they might not be there in the end, but they acted as the guards, the controls, that paid the light bill inside the tunnel and obscured the distant beam at end.

“He had an angelic afternoon after work when he walked into the tavern and he got to talk to some of the old guard.”

by Jeremiah Collins June 3, 2025

SU Security Guard

Someone that wakes up early to enter the student union. They tend not to go to classes and they will be there 99% of the time. Legend has it it that if you say their name 3 times they’ll appear.

Fade: precious you’re an SU security guard.
Precious: how?
Fade: you open the SU

by TLoba2Splashy2Cashy February 8, 2022

splatter guard

A device made from toilet paper that keeps diarrhea from splattering all over the toilet.

Girl, you ate those BK onion rings last night. You're gonna need a splatter guard.

by jman2001 May 20, 2014