Recovering Guido

After many long, hard years of perfecting the legendary hairstyle with gallons of gel, consecutively tanning to reach expected standards, pumping iron until each chisel of every muscle visibly shows through your one-size-too-small-for-your-now-jacked-body ghinny tee, and, obviously, mastering the infamous fist pump so that each pump is in sync with the rhythm of the beats blasting through the walls of Sound Factory, you start to realize that you’re 28 years old and you’ve reached, exceeded and then over-exceeded any expectations that were put in front of you that day in high school when you decided to take on such an exuberating challenge and now you have nothing more to live for since you’ve devoted so much blood, sweat and tears into perfecting your distinguished way of life, so you opt for that other way of life that everyone else in the world has decided to choose.

Guido: Yo bro, im feelin good tonite bro. We gota juice up nice n get ta da club. Me n you, bro, wea gona bang mad bitches at the club, u kno wa im sayin?

Recovering Guido: I’m sorry, Tony. I can’t. I’ve been guido-free for 10 months now and my guidos anonymous leader says I’m doing real good. Sometimes I get the urge to buy more hair gel, but that’s not what’s affecting me the most. It’s when the beats start playing in my head over and over and all I want to do is pump my fucking fist so hard in the air. It’s so hard Tony. I’m learning to take deep breaths and breathe though, this normal way of life isn’t that bad after all. You should try it too.

Guido: Wack, bro.

by a lion. December 4, 2009

Kebab Remover

The name of the NZ shooter's gun

The Mosque was attacked with a gun named the Kebab Remover

by Shitpost IRL March 17, 2019

Boomer Remover

Alternate name for Covid-19 aka Coronavirus , used by the younger generation in regards to the virus wiping out the Boomer generation

I just got news the "boomer remover" took my old English teacher.. God I hated that guy

by Natered85 March 15, 2020

Recover Your Life

Self Harm and Eating Disorder support site. Possibly the biggest on the internet.
Containing endless pages of fantastic information, a chatroom, live assistance and a Forum.
All for support and distraction.

Recover your life member 1: I really feel horrible, I need support, help?
Recover your life memeber 2: Hey, we're here for you, what's the problem?

by Fi. December 13, 2008

Anal Recovery Day

Also known as ARD. Anal recovery day is when a sick or PTO day must be used to be absent from work or school due to having your anal region pummeled during sexual activity the evening prior. Time is needed to recover from the gape, tenderness and even the ability to walk straight again.

HR: Good Morning HR department.

Employee: Hi this is Rachel in Accounting. I’m going to need to take a sick day today so I won’t be in.

HR: Sorry to hear that. Feel better. Is it the flu that’s going around?
Employee: I wish. It’s an anal recovery day. My boyfriend hit it hard last night. I may have a fissure.

by Eaton Holgoode June 2, 2018

Credit Recovery

some faggot ass bullshit that high schoolers everywhere hate. It is a form of retaking a class where you stay 2 or more hours after school and sit bored as fuck in front of a computer and retake a class virtually.

"Man, i fucking hate credit recovery! its a fucking ass bitch! i wish i wouldnt have failed!"

by 12455 December 21, 2008

Slut in Recovery

A girl who was once a slut, but has changed her ways, and instead of sleeping with every man she meets, she has more self control and can say "no" to sex...most of the time.

I am a slut in recovery

by Slut in recovery September 27, 2005