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jesus h. christ on a tin fucking crutch 

a term used to describe something shocking, or so dumfounded and stupid.
Staff sergeant: jesus h. christ on a tin fucking crutch!, carl what the fucking hell have you done?!

specialist Carl: exactly what you told me to do sergeant I burn the shitter.

Staff sergeant: jesus christ, carl do as I mean not as I say!!
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jesus H. christ 

The H. stands for Herald

definition of herald:

1. an official messenger bringing news.

2. a person or thing viewed as a sign that something is about to happen.
jesus H. christ's H stands for Herald
jesus H. christ by sawrce July 11, 2022

Jesus H. Christ 

"I am God."
- Jesus H. Christ

Jesus. H Christ 

Jesus. H Christ, I didn't know that she was my 15-year-old daughter

*Sweet home Alabama starts playing*

That is how mafia works.
Jesus. H Christ by joeweller53 January 20, 2019

Jesus H. Christopherson 

When you start to take the name of the Lord God in vain but then follow it up with an 'opherson' at the end so it doesn't seem like you're breaking one of the commandments.
Someone that is supposed to be a Christian and -lets say- works in construction is hammering a nail but smashes his finger and yells; "Jesus H. Christopherson!"