by Anniew March 18, 2008
Get the Asset Protectionmug. by yo yo mon bitoch March 31, 2005
Get the citigroup asset managementmug. You: Hows your husband?
Friend: Oh that jackass? I'm divorcing him.
You: Yea ditch the ass, sieze the assets.
Friend: Oh that jackass? I'm divorcing him.
You: Yea ditch the ass, sieze the assets.
by doubletrouble22 September 25, 2009
Get the Ditch the Ass, Sieze the Assetsmug. When the continuation of depreciating a long term tangible asset at a diminishing value becomes unprofitable or purposeless, so the company decides to dispose of the asset at a stipulated cost which is below book value resulting in a loss which is then offsetted against the companies profits. A transaction of this nature is usually made when the asset becomes dormant and ineffective, even though it may well still be in the beginning of its life expectancy. The disposing of as asset is also written off the Balance Sheet as a long term investment and making way for a more effective and valuable long term asset.
If there is capital to be made on disposing of an asset, then both parties agree to a value where under the table cash transactions are made (off the books) and a much lower value is agreed upon (on the books) which is then recorded as a loss and offsetted against the companies net profit.
If there is capital to be made on disposing of an asset, then both parties agree to a value where under the table cash transactions are made (off the books) and a much lower value is agreed upon (on the books) which is then recorded as a loss and offsetted against the companies net profit.
Rupert Murdoch: "I got rid of Alex!" James sighed, "I thought he was an asset, turns out he was nothing but a liability"
Alan Bond: "What do you mean you got rid of him, hope you didn't kill him"
Rupert Murdoch: "Nah, there's no gain from killing him, I sold him to the opposition and i made a profit"
Alan Bond: "Ahhhh, now I can see how Wendi Deng has asianized you"
Rupert Murdoch: "What do you mean by that?"
Alan Bond: "Nothing!, you know hoe Asians are carnivorous when it comes to money, it looks like it's rubbing off on you"
Rupert Murdoch: " Yep, learn Alan, disposing of an asset requires a lot of foot work if you know what I mean".
Alan Bond: "What do you mean you got rid of him, hope you didn't kill him"
Rupert Murdoch: "Nah, there's no gain from killing him, I sold him to the opposition and i made a profit"
Alan Bond: "Ahhhh, now I can see how Wendi Deng has asianized you"
Rupert Murdoch: "What do you mean by that?"
Alan Bond: "Nothing!, you know hoe Asians are carnivorous when it comes to money, it looks like it's rubbing off on you"
Rupert Murdoch: " Yep, learn Alan, disposing of an asset requires a lot of foot work if you know what I mean".
by A=L+P January 19, 2018
Get the Disposing of an assetmug. A young woman, from moroccan /german descent, who has to finish a vast amount of social media ads, while being understaffed
by 2893uuhn December 26, 2022
Get the Asset Girlmug. Person 1: I'm leaving the Democratic Party. They no longer represent my values
Person 2: Wow. You are such a traitor and a Russian asset!
Person 2: Wow. You are such a traitor and a Russian asset!
by ReaperMan26 October 11, 2022
Get the Russian assetmug. Oh wow yeah, totally... Women are a TOTAL asset. They clean up your house for you? That helps a lot. That OR! OR they let you fuck them on camera and then THAT helps EVEN MORE. Because THEN I have 200 million dollars and I'll just be doing the thing I WOULD HAVE BEEN DOING ANYWAY. It's like being a pro gamer! Or a streamer! Or a podcaster.
Fatcock "Wait... You mean I can cut out the middle-man and get paid to TALK about fucking all of the women? Shit bro, sign me up. You see, I got this mindset dawg... And it's like... Bro... You gotta get some assests. Right? And you can't SPELL asset without 'ass'? Right? You see. I got this way of talking to em, right? I thought it up with my thinky thoughts, bro."
Hym 😒 "Oh? Yeah? Do you talk to them AS THOUGH... you ALREADY KNOW... YOU... Are GOING to fuck them?"
Fatcock "Uh-er, Wha-"
Hym "Like you KNOW they are going to do the thing that they ARE GOING TO DO... and there aren't any REAL, LASTING consequences to your interaction (negative or positive) because when I say 'THEY are going to fuck you' I don't mean 'THEY' at an individual level but 'THEY' as an abstraction and in aggregate. Like, YOU KNOW you're going to fuck 'them'."
Fatcock "Yeah, buuuuuut 😌☝️ I deserve it... Cus of the mindset. And then I make a bunch of sluts.... But, wait, my FRESH SLUT... SHE doesn't COUNT as a slut. Right? So you gotta respect her becuase she's the good one and, um, I'm also the good one."
Hym 🤨 "Because of the mindset?" 🤨
Hym 😒 "Oh? Yeah? Do you talk to them AS THOUGH... you ALREADY KNOW... YOU... Are GOING to fuck them?"
Fatcock "Uh-er, Wha-"
Hym "Like you KNOW they are going to do the thing that they ARE GOING TO DO... and there aren't any REAL, LASTING consequences to your interaction (negative or positive) because when I say 'THEY are going to fuck you' I don't mean 'THEY' at an individual level but 'THEY' as an abstraction and in aggregate. Like, YOU KNOW you're going to fuck 'them'."
Fatcock "Yeah, buuuuuut 😌☝️ I deserve it... Cus of the mindset. And then I make a bunch of sluts.... But, wait, my FRESH SLUT... SHE doesn't COUNT as a slut. Right? So you gotta respect her becuase she's the good one and, um, I'm also the good one."
Hym 🤨 "Because of the mindset?" 🤨
by Hym Iam March 27, 2023
Get the Assetmug.