congenital douchebaggery syndrome

Congenital douchebaggery syndrome (CDS) is a devastating affliction affecting persons in positions of perceived, rather than genuine, importance. Most sufferers of CDS are unaware of their affliction, and can do little to mitigate the symptoms. Symptoms include, but are not limited to:

* A pervasive need to appear valuable to every situation
* Desire to assert superiority over all others at any junction
* Ability to create "facts" out of thin air and whole hardheartedly believe them
* Insistence on including oneself in discussions despite having nothing of value to add
* Determination to "help" everyone, especially those who don't need any help the afflicted could conceivably provide

CDS awareness is spreading. General understanding of CDS as an affliction can help in the survival rate of CDS, as associates of CDS sufferers may look upon the afflicted with pity and be less likely to murder them in the break room.

"Did you hear that BS Jerry was spouting at the team meeting?"
"Oh, don't take that to heart, he has congenital douchebaggery syndrome. He can't help it."

by Foxydot March 29, 2015

congenital glaucoma

What happened to fetty waps left eye

Fetty wap:"when I was little I had gotten into a little accident and it gave me congenital glaucoma in both of my eyes. The doctor saved one, I was blessed to still have my vision. That's it. That's the story."

by Swagurt0000 November 1, 2015

congalos

Tiny fish testicles.

No matter how hard i try, i cant see my fish's congalos.

by McBiznitch January 8, 2016

conglatulation

Conglatulation is a misspeling of Congratulations used in some NES games.

Can be used as a satire.

Angry video game nerd: Conglatulation? This story is happy end? You feel strongth welling in your body? Return to start point, Challenge again? Is "Congratulations" to hard to spell?

Jim: I did it! i beat this battle in Clash of clans!

Jim's dad: Conglatulation! You just wasted $5!

by Koopinator January 13, 2016

conglobate

To suck dick while cutting and playing games and skyping

My friends saw me when i conglobated, it was because i was skyping with them.

by Conglobater January 27, 2017

cong can (conc)

someone with a large forehead on the body of a rectangle,

commonly found on the 9gag website.

Stop being such a cong can (conc), you need to exercise!

by cong can vu May 27, 2017

coney island cod fish

A condom that washes ashore on a beach

I put a coney island cod fish on before banging my step mom on the beach.

by Monto Juan April 18, 2018