computer witness

A particular subgenre of computer geek. Someone who is obsessed with computers for the sake of computers and not for what they can do. Will often spend hours running performance tests and having "races" between different chips with various programs without ever getting any actual work done on said equipment.

Gene longs for the good old days of the Macs-vs-PCs war...those were some good times, up late with a flat of Mountain Dew and all his buddies racing their computers. Gene is a computer witness.

by DJ HORSERACING ACCIDENTS September 1, 2004

computerplaegic

Refers to adults that are paralized at the sight of a computer; also those who are terrified at the thought of using a computer.

Technophobes; Anti-Geek

Having taken pity on his computerplaegic father, the 12 year-old helps him with his laptop.

by E. Irvin Fischer February 6, 2008

Computer callous

A computer callous is located on the heel of your hand, usually the hand you use to move your mouse.

It is usually caused by the heel of your hand being rubbed against the mouse mat for long periods of time, usually during all nighters on the internet.

A computer callous is most often a little more red than your usual skin tone and is quite soft and smooth.

Hoshit, I've been on the computer so long I've aquired a computer callous.

by Hollydollie August 21, 2009

Computer Vomit

When your computer (usually involves a Microsoft product) decides to print or display a screen full of unrecognizable jibberish. This often will happen for no apparent reason and at the worst possible times, like when you are trying to save something important or watch porn. This usually leads most people to either destroy said computer in a fit of uncontrollable rage or break down in tears, whichever works better.

I was trying to print out my weekly inventory report and then, BAM, computer vomit. Where's the blowtorch?!

by ccham March 12, 2011

Computer Poddy

When you sit down for your 1st daily session at the computer, and 5 to 10 minutes later, you have to interrupt your computer session to go poddy.

I hate it! Every time I sit down at my computer, I have to get up and go computer poddy!

by PDXGrammarGirl January 16, 2011

computerist

A computerist is a person who feels some form of prejudice towards a particular brand, model or color of a computer.

"You think my computer is going to crash just because it's black? What a computerist you are!"

by JackIsReallyCool December 18, 2012

Computer Breakfast

When one substitutes the first and most important meal of the day to use their computer instead.

I was going to go make myself some bacon and eggs, but I ended up having a computer breakfast instead.

by Originalnilson December 12, 2012