Halliburton Handjob

The act of jerking someone off to distract them from the Alaskan Pipeline that’s about to be shoved up their ass.

Most frequently employed by DC lobbyists on various segments of the American public and by Amber Heard on unsuspecting romantic partners.

1. Dazzled by the company’s offer of thousands of good-paying factory jobs in exchange for tax cuts and reduced regulations, the city council was once again fooled by the old Halliburton Handjob.

2. After hearing of her boyfriend Brodie’s infidelity, Justine organized a gangbang and ambushed Brodie with a Halliburton Handjob in front of all his friends.

by Call Me Ahab January 20, 2024

Bronx Handjob

Punching someone in the dick, quickly and repeatedly

Lucas introducing metachlorians to explain The Force pissed us off so much we held him down and gave him a Bronx Handjob

by UnexpectedBacon November 10, 2024

Harambe handjob

A handjob given by someone with extremely firm grip

Damn I’m sore he/she gave me that harambe handjob last night, thought they were going to rip my dick off.

by Steve Erwin February 9, 2024

Feral Handjob

The use of mud , sand or dirt as lube as a woman jerks your off onto her stomach.

Natalie gave me a feral handjob and I blew my load all the way onto her face

Natalie gave me a feral handjob and I blew my load all the way onto her face.

by BellsBeach50 May 2, 2019

Yuuka handjob

a touhou styled sexual act where yuuka kazami from touhou project strokes your penis 2/47 until you cum, she sometimes assists you by making you suck on her breasts (since it's a nursing handjob) and funny enough yuuka did the nursing handjob on reimu trust me i saw them do it before it's hot and she also calls you "good boy" or "good miko" if it's a futa shrine maiden like reimu hakurei

Yuuka Kazami: Good Miko~ Let Me Soften It Up A Little~
Reimu Hakurei: *blushing in enjoyment*
Yuuka Kazami: I'm Glad You're Enjoying~ Reimu-san~
Reimu Hakurei: Y-Yuuka~ I Think I-I'm Cumming!~
Yuuka Kazami : Mhm~ I Knew You Would Like This~
Reimu: Agh~ *thick white stuff release*
Yuuka Kazami: Fufu~ You're Warm~
yuuka handjob is funny

by byakuraen December 26, 2024

arangatang handjob

1.When a masculine girl gives you a ferocious handjob
2. When a girl has giant hairy hands and gives you a handjob

- “That bitch almost ripped my dick”
-“Damn she gave you a arangatang handjob“

by DontEatMyAss December 15, 2017

Poseidons Handjob

When you take a shit and the water from the toilet touches your penis

"Dude, last night after that Mexican food gave me a Poseidons Handjob"

by WujekBartek December 26, 2021