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The Toledo Tablecloth

The Toledo Tablecloth is primarily used to score revenge or payback and is similar to a Texas Doily. The Toledo Tablecloth is best deployed over an end table or other small decorative table. Once deployed, a rapid exit from the location where it has been laid should be made so as to leave the tablecloth behind for furture discovery.

To create The Toledo Tablecloth, an individual must shit their grunders, aka underware intentionally, or use grunders that have significant skid marks, mud tracks or shit stains. To create the "tablecloth", take the underware off and turn them inside out making it a point to retain as much fecal matter as possible. Next, stretch the waistband opening around the edges of an end table or other small decorative table and pulling the band down the sides. Fold the legs of the underware over to the side so as to cover any exposed top of the table. Be sure to leave the shart stain as close to the middle of the table top as possible. Center as best as possible. Leave quickly for discovery by others.
Unfortunately, Roger got off from work early and decided to drop by his girlfriend Mary Ann's house and surprise her. To Roger's dismay, he crept in only to find Mary Ann having sex with her neighbor Carl. Roger walked in just as Carl was diggning in the garden. Rather than becoming enraged, Roger did not disrupt their doggie style play and left the room. He copped a squat in the living room and laid a fresh, wet shart in his grunders. He then created The Toledo Tablecloth on Mary Ann's brand new Rooms To Go end table. He quickly left the house so he could clean up his sticky crack corn at a nearby 7-11.
by Eaton Holgoode February 23, 2014
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J.R.R. Tolkien

an artist and a genius. Known for the Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit. Pretty much awesonme dude. Wish I could have met him before he died.
Guy: Who's that Tolkien guy?
Girl: You don't know? Let's go to my nerd lair and find out.
by Elisabeth Sherman November 24, 2004
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Related Words
TOL tolo tolga tolerance tola tolly Tolu Toledo told Toleen

It does what its told

1. Phrase used when someone is totally and utterly whipped
by someone.
2. Silence of the lambs.
Teacher: Do you work please class.
John: MAKE ME A FUCKIN SANDWICH BITCH!
Teacher: Uh.... ok....
Nes: It does what its told!!!
by John Kern November 22, 2005
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Tolstoy

(verb)

to make significantly longer than is necessary to convey the relevant message; derived from Leo Tolstoy whose classic literature is quite long and wordy
Hey man, I just asked for a light, not your life story. You didn't have to Tolstoy me.
by nyaaron August 26, 2009
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Toledo Mud Flap

A "Toledo Mud Flap" occurs when a man has anal sex with a woman (or man, if that's your thing) who has diarrhea. The man's testicles act as a mud flap, keeping excrement from splattering all over the room.
David has given the Toledo Mud Flap to a fat girl this week.
by Dirty Rugger July 11, 2009
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Tolkiendil

An enthusiast of the works of J.R.R. Tolkien. The word ending '-endil' from Tolkien's invented Quenya language roughly corresponds to the English '-phile'.
Stephen Colbert is a huge Tolkiendil
by HordeOfDoom June 25, 2013
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0-tolerance

making no exception to a rule or law
The town had a 0-tolerance policy for DUI.
by The Return of Light Joker January 31, 2008
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