one handed diagonal downward dog

another insane and must likely unattainable sex position invented by the horny middle aged women who work at cosmopolitan. if one wants to "try" the one handed diagonal downward dog one must first know what the reverse cowgirls is and go from there.

friend1:"I had the most incredible sex with tony last night we tried out the best new position."
friend2:"Oh Em Gee what's it called? I HAVE to know"
friend1:"The one handed diagonal downward dog duh! what else? haven't you read your latest cosmo?"

by bretheren April 28, 2005

jazz handed

It's when you're getting completely fisted (by a colleague, your boss, the man, etc) with the added value of them opening their hand completely and giving it a shimmy shake.

I'm grossly underpaid at work. I'm getting royally jazz handed.

by twisted spinach June 24, 2010

left handed screwdriver

When a man who is right hand dominate masturbates with his right hand to ejaculate into his left hand. He then uses the ejaculate as lubrication to masturbate a second time with his left hand.

I downloaded this awesome donkey porn last night and I had to use a left handed screwdriver to finish watching it.

by Lefty McTwyst January 26, 2011

Kyle-Handed

When a guy with commitment issues hands back the feelings you felt for him, and he just moves on to the next thing with boobs and a vagina. He says he just dumped a girl for you, making you feel special and then BAM before you know it, he uses the same line on the next girl handy.

I basically Kyle-handed her.

by Britta B. Davis May 1, 2011

Glad handed

Glad handed is when you play a game of basketball and someone grabs your buns when you're down low.

I was in the lane and Buddy threw me the ball, next thing I know, someone glad handed me.

by Old_savage August 6, 2016

side handed ape gribbler

is when you gingerly GINGERLY!!!!!
slide your hand down the musky leathery crook of your swath. Eagerly sniff your thumb webbing and become completely appualed by the combined stench of sack sweat and bowel residues.

What the fuck Jesse? did you just give yourself a "side handed ape gribbler" because your hand totally reeks of frumunda.

by chunk shlagle November 14, 2006

left handed hug

to firmly hug someone and hold them with one arm close and tight, preferably with your dominate arm for strength purposes, then slowly slide your free hand down that person's back, spreading their meat-cheeks with your hands and penetrating their chocolate starfish with your fingers, thus a forced reach-around.

My girl friend broke up with me so I asked for one last hug goodbye, needless to say it was a "left handed hug".

by humbleguy November 12, 2011