Five Man Failure

Five Man Failure:Small business with less than 10 people. The business is usually dysfunctional. The CEO of the company has 'observation blindness' and coddles bad employees. In a large company issue employees would have been sacked for more dynamic candidates.

That tube store employee is passive aggressive and never emailed me to tell me that my special order was cancelled two months ago. They're running a "Five Man Failure".

by Energysoul July 26, 2016

catastrophic raid failure

Catastrophic RAID failure means your ultra-secret data saw the attack helicopters over the horizon and locked itself in the impenetrable underground bunker and detonated landmines and deployed automated weaponry all around the base. Enemy forces were wiped out in their entirety.

The good news is that your data is secure and bravely refused to allow itself to be compromised. Bad news is that I don't think your data is ever coming out of there again.

Hello,

Unfortunately earlier today the host that your VPS resides on had suffered a catastrophic RAID failure and was irrecoverable. We had attempted to restore the data but were unsuccessful. We have since created a new container and emailed you the new login information. We apologize for the inconvenience this has caused.

Regards,

by Peculiar Musings July 14, 2016

e-mail failure

when you type someone’s name wrong in an email but the government knows who you were trying to contact and contacts them through esp anyways.

The e-mail failure had someone thinking about the sender during the day.

by Coop Dupe December 12, 2019

sense of humour failure

A phrase used by a manager as an awkward semi-apology after they lose their temper at their employees. This is the closest to an apology you're likely to get.

Prevalent in the UK tech and consulting sector.

(after boss has stopped shouting obscenities at their staff)
"I'm afraid I've had a sense of humour failure..."

by QuartermasterGeralt June 3, 2020

Being a Failure

Being a Failure is when Steven He's dad grabs the sandal and gives you permanent emotional damage.

You are being a failure.
-Steven's Dad

by j4k3yy November 11, 2022

Spring lock Failure

A Springlock Failure is the event in which a Springlock Suit's spring loaded devices keeping the animatronic as a suit snaps shut, resetting it back into an animatronic with a wearer inside, typically crushing the wearer to death. Springlock Failures are often caused by moisture, heavy breathing, or failure to correctly set up the springlocks.

"And if you trigger those spring locks, two things will happen: first the locks themselves will snap right into you, making deep cuts all over your body, and a split second later, all the animatronic parts, all that sharp steel and hard plastic will instantly be driven into your body. You will die, but it will be slow. You’ll feel your organs punctured, the suit will grow wet with your blood, and you will know you’re dying for long, long minutes. You’ll try to scream, but you will be unable to: your vocal cords will be severed, and your lungs will fill with your own blood until you drown in it." -William Afton describing a Spring lock Failure, The Silver Eyes

by QueenHHJ June 29, 2023

Donut of failure

1.) A very depressing donut.

2.) A sad person who fails a lot

Example 1:
Chloe: Ewww that donut makes me sad
Sarah: It tasted like a glazed bagel
Chloe: It's a donut of failure

Example 2:
Mikey is such a donut of failure.

by DonutOfFailure November 3, 2023