anal bead self defense

i sell used anal beads on twitter

i had to use anal bead self defense when i was attacked when i sold my used anal beads on twitter.

by pp.penis April 14, 2023

Tiny Defense

An IOS and Android tower defense game where tiny robots called "Minirobots" defend their home planet from invaders called the "Machines".

Me: Damn, I almost forgot all about Tiny Defense. I'd whittle away many a happy hour fighting the Machines with the help of the Minirobots. It's times like these when I know I grew up too fast.

by MalumLibrum958 January 1, 2023

white boy defense

when you have a defender that is "meat riding" you without actually playing defense

"Yo, let's play these niggas"

"nah man he play white boy defense"

by yxrick November 11, 2018

Defensive Boner

The tightening of the urethral sphincter to prevent the flow of urine. Increased blood flow to the penis constricts the urethra so you don't piss yourself in your sleep.

Sarge: "Holster that weapon private!"

Pvt P.P: "It's a defensive boner sir! I really have to pee!"

by IamRob April 19, 2018

spam/telemarketer defense

Refers to a person's using the well-known prevalence of widespread fake/mass-advertising correspondence as an excuse for his not obeying/acknowledging a 100%-legitimate-but-unwelcome message he has received, such as a hefty bill, restraining order, or other upsetting/disappointing directive that he does not wish to comply with ("Well, it made no sense to me, so I honestly believed it was just a fake message, and simply shrugged it off"). The effectiveness and/or defense-worthiness of said practice --- and your chances of being let off the hook as a result --- can sometimes be further bolstered by "pre-innocentizing" yourself (such as frequently showing up in court for no reason and claiming every time that you'd received an order to appear, and then finally --- after being irritably told for the umpteenth time by the court-clerk that they'd never sent you a summons --- declaring in a frustrated huff, "Fine... well, I guess somebody's been playing sick jokes on me, so from now on I'm just gonna simply IGNORE any and all such notices I receive!") sometime before committing whatever infractions would likely result in said unwelcome orders, so that you can appear justified in your non-compliance with what you supposedly thought was yet another fake order.

I successfully used the spam/telemarketer defense when asked why I hadn't answered a court-summons; I just said, "Oh, that notice was REAL? Oh my --- well, I'd honestly believed it was a fake message... since I've had so many pushy telemarketers and con-men harass me --- sometimes even falsely claiming to be tax-auditors or law-enforcement personnel --- that I'd long ago adopted an 'ignore any and all such notices as fake' policy."

by QuacksO August 9, 2018

Self Defense

most people is to protect yourself but some is to do it with someone at karate

“he strangled me so i laughed uwu” that is self defense right there

by defnotsomeonewhoknowslayla August 9, 2022

Self Defense

for most it’s protecting your self from harm but for laylas it is doing it with someone at karate

“he chokes me so i laughed uwu” that is apparently the definition of self defense now

by defnotsomeonewhoknowslayla August 9, 2022