A massage involving Italian pizza ingredients, where the masseuse works tomato sauce, mozzarella cheese, and dough into a patron's muscular tissue.
"I give-a you a Italian Massage...you gonna poop, it's gonna be stinky, but it's gonna be good. Voila!"
by Avergae Jodecci July 29, 2025
Get the Italian Massagemug. A circuit training program which combines exercise with massage. This was created by Major Martha Halftrack, US Army (Ret.). Usually done in the mornings before her husband, Amos, gets up. It is very comforting. So, if you want comfort without a barrage, go to Camp Swampy and get a Marty Massage.
Marty: Hey Bryant, you look tired, honey. What can I do to wake you up? (Suddenly snaps her hand) I know, how about a Marty Massage? You love those!
Bryant: Okay, how about five minutes of massage, then we run down to the DFAC and back again, and then another massage? (Jumps up and takes off running)
Marty: Whoah! Hold up! We haven't even done the warm up stretches, yet. Remember, you can't do PT cold body. You'd rip a muscle, sweetie pie.
Amos: What are you two doing? Oh, the Marty Massage? I love that! Can I do it, too?
Bryant: Sure! Drop and give me one-fifty! (Blows the whistle) Ten HUT!
Marty: Good God! One hundred and fifty push ups? That's a lot of push ups. That's my honeybear, don't burn him up!
Bryant: I'm not. (They all start running for the DFAC) I'm hungry. All this exercise made me want to eat.
Amos: Whoah! Me too! I gotta eat. Then, after we eat, we can burn off more goo. Good thing she knows what she's talking about.
Marty: Well, would any of you like a massage? Its not just exercise, its massage too! The Marty Massage is awesome!
Bryant: Okay, how about five minutes of massage, then we run down to the DFAC and back again, and then another massage? (Jumps up and takes off running)
Marty: Whoah! Hold up! We haven't even done the warm up stretches, yet. Remember, you can't do PT cold body. You'd rip a muscle, sweetie pie.
Amos: What are you two doing? Oh, the Marty Massage? I love that! Can I do it, too?
Bryant: Sure! Drop and give me one-fifty! (Blows the whistle) Ten HUT!
Marty: Good God! One hundred and fifty push ups? That's a lot of push ups. That's my honeybear, don't burn him up!
Bryant: I'm not. (They all start running for the DFAC) I'm hungry. All this exercise made me want to eat.
Amos: Whoah! Me too! I gotta eat. Then, after we eat, we can burn off more goo. Good thing she knows what she's talking about.
Marty: Well, would any of you like a massage? Its not just exercise, its massage too! The Marty Massage is awesome!
by Dusty's Baby Powder August 1, 2011
Get the Marty Massagemug. My wife got really drunk last night. She even agreed when I asked if I could give her a Greenfield Massage!
by EggFucker003 November 5, 2019
Get the Greenfield Massagemug. "I was a judge at the Volunteer Fire department chili cook off. Later that night I have the Mrs a loud Tennessee Pneumatic Massage"
by TeeRizzle February 11, 2023
Get the Tennessee Pneumatic Massagemug. by thegchad May 18, 2024
Get the Finger Knuckle Massagermug. by twbshdi34 February 23, 2024
Get the massage envymug. Hi Girlllsss! YOU KNOW it's that month, last month it was skipped, so i get to massage your boobs! ITS NATIONAL MASSAGE BOOBS DAYYYYY!!!!
by Omran's lover October 16, 2019
Get the National massage boobs daymug.