Calvin University

A Christian University in Grand Rapids, Michigan U.S.A. Known for its Jesus freaks, hot snobby bitches, and shitty investments. Has a 99% acceptance rate because they don't hesitate to financially rape someones' pockets for $47K a year. Doesn't have any real sports. 100% "dry" campus. If you fuck someone in the dorms, they will kick you out. About 90% of the student body is composed of social retards who go there because they grew up in sheltered, Jesus loving, god fearing communities and are attempting to add four more years to avoiding the real world. Most students graduate in over four years due to the schools' curriculum of required theology and other bullshit classes that real schools don't teach. The student body is about as ethnically diverse as Toronto, Ontario (roughly 70% white, 30% asian, and about six blacks). The asians generally stay with one another and avoid white people like they're going to put them in concentration camps. Most of the guys are skinny dickless choches. The very small number of athletically toned guys have no problem tearing through the poon like it's spring break. The girls are stuck up twats who use their religion as an excuse as to why they claim to be virgins. Every girl there will put-out for a guy if his family is rich. Everyone there will piss themselves at the notion of atheists and other non-christian people. Best way to get someone to jerk off in front of you is to start talking about Jesus.

Normal college student: "So what did you do this weekend?"

Calvin University student: "I went to chapel and praised Jesus by the seminary pond. How about you?"

Normal college student: "I went to a party and got shitfaced then proceeded to show my genitalia to everyone and ended up waking up in a bed with two women and a pool of vomit next to me. It was about the usual."

Calvin University student: "You're going to hell."

by ItsTheRabbi October 31, 2019

Nicholas Caging

To eat a peach while receiving oral sex

"Peach. I can eat a peach for hours.. while receiving oral sex"

"I've been Nicholas Caging this one bitch for like 3 weeks and still aint hit that shit"

"He asked me to stop and pick up some peaches, so he can Nicholas Cage me later tonight"

"When i went down on him, he started singing how do I live by Faith Hill"

(I know that last one is not from Face/Off, but i guess there are many ways to Nicholas Cage someone) I encourage you to find your own ways

by A synonym for pothead May 4, 2010

cain't

A cross between the standard englih contraction "can't"(can not) and non-standard english contraction "ain't" (am not). This combination of contraction forms a powerful word encompassing "can not", "am not", "is not", "are not", and "have not".

English Standard: "I cain't get the tractor to run"
Ebonic: "Nigga I can't.. I'm high as hell"

by SomeDudePPF April 18, 2006

caking

flirting (excessive flirting)

Ashley and Desmond are always caking but when we ask them about it, they always deny it!

by noturlexus May 3, 2004

cakin

1.) Shacked up all day with your wife/girlfriend/honey.
2.) On the phone for hours on end ignoring everything around you
3.) Choosing not to kick it with your boys to be with a female

TBoy: Say lil Mookie. Lets go roll this swisha...
Mookie: Naw ma'an. Ima just kick it with *female*. I'll holla at u later
TBoy: Man you cakin NIGGA!!!

by TyffNi Leneá December 11, 2006

Calvin

a tosspot who looks himself up on urbandictionary and thinks its all about him


:P

calvin, you are such a calvin! go outside!

by gueshhoo October 8, 2008

Calvin

(Verb) to grab someone's genitalia in a public place

Eden totally just calvined that guy on the bus.

by thessgroup February 22, 2009