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Turd burglar

An individual who has the annoying habit of making a scene outside the stall while you’re trying pop a deuce in order to get you to hurry up. Turd Burglars show up typical when you’re in public bathroom in a busy location and someone very impatient shows up and decides to interrupt your shitting session.
>You: answering nature’s call in a public bathroom like a normal person

> Turd burglar: “ Hurry up mister I need to go, I NEED TO GO!!!” X 50 on loop until you finish pushing your slimy turd
by Thicke Henry Richard September 8, 2020
mugGet the Turd burglarmug.

Fetus Burglar

A person who steals fetuses, either directly from the womb, or from planned parenthood. His/her weapon of choice: Clothes Hanger.
Guy 1: "Hey what's that going through the window?!"

Guy 2: "OH MY GOD, it's. Fetus Burglar, and it's going towards my pregnant wife!"

Guy 1: "She's not gonna be pregnant much longer."
by Fetus_Burglar August 4, 2016
mugGet the Fetus Burglarmug.

Clam Burglar

Clam Burglar:

(Cl-am Berg-ger-lar)

1. Noun: An aggressive lesbian

2. Verb: To grab a lady by the pussy

3. Noun: A thief who steals exclusively clams from a seafood market or Red Lobster
John Doe: “Hey. That’s definitely a Clam Burglar over there in the Peanutbutter Hair Cut and hairy armpits.

Jim Doe: “Nah homes…. That’s Crystal…She just likes to weed eight times a day….”
by C.S.H. March 13, 2022
mugGet the Clam Burglarmug.

Jerk Burglar

Robbing a house while jerking off in nothing but a man-thong, shooting his bodily fluids onto the furniture.
Bro, my house is covered in cum, I think a Jerk Burglar was here.
by 28getalife April 10, 2025
mugGet the Jerk Burglarmug.

Jerk Burglar

Jerking off in a public bathroom that stinks so bad, you wear a mask on your fave to cover the smell
The smell was so bad in the public bathroom, but I had to have a go at myself.... now I'm a jerk burglar
by Gar Goyle June 21, 2024
mugGet the Jerk Burglarmug.

Turd burglar

A Turd burglar is a mythical being that takes your turds (aka poop) from your toilet at night when everyone is asleep, similar to the tooth fairy legend.
Little boy: Mommy when will the turd burglar come?

Mother: oh honey the turd burglar only comes at night when your asleep.
by BeeftGunkle June 20, 2023
mugGet the Turd burglarmug.

We've had Polish burglars

A term used to try and cover up the fact that you have wet yourself - usually under the influence of alcohol. It derives from the tendency of Eastern European thieves to urinate in the houses they break in to.
Carston: Dude, I hope you don't mind me stopping by. I was in your hood
DeAndre: It's trill man. I just sittin here drinking
Carlton: whoa dude what is that smell. It smells like piss. And are your pants wet?
DeAndre: oh, er, um. I think we've had Polish burglars.

That night Juan Carlos drank two litres of Tequila all by himself. About two thirds of the way through the second, he has Polish burglars.
by Trill_LV December 25, 2014
mugGet the We've had Polish burglarsmug.

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