Two-Way Wiper

An individual that is so stingy, that after wiping their ass with some toilet paper, they flip it over and use the unsoiled side.

Steve: Fucking Jim wouldn't even loan me five dollars so I can buy a slice of pizza.
John: Well, what do you expect? The guy is a Two-Way Wiper!

by traphouse333 June 20, 2018

two-legged twatwaffle

A Two-legged twatwaffle is a stupid bar skank with a std

Yo Bro, look at this chick i picked up
Dude! Brad thats a two-legged twatwaffle
Next morning: Brad "why does it burn when i pee"

by country bear July 15, 2018

texas two step

when two country boys get into a fight.

earl: "hey joe, willy and jesse just did the texas two step"
joe: "I know, willy kicked jesse's ass".

by diggymac July 18, 2018

two-word whatchamacallit

A game in which a couple (or a group), does disgusting sexual acts from Urban Dictionary that contain EXACTLY two words. The game ends when someone forfeits; that player loses and everyone else wins.

Cyan: I heard that the neighbors are doing the two-word whatchamacallit.
Sky: What the-- (vomits)

by Blues and Dumbness July 20, 2018

Two faced

When someone acts friendly to your face but the moment u turn your back they talk shit about u

Tiffany: I cant believe Nathans girlfriend would go with him his so ugly. (Sees Nathan on the other aile) Oh hey Nathan how are u doing buddy.
Me and my friend: shes so two faced

by I hate Walmart August 22, 2018

Fill two needs with one deed

To achieve two simultaneous goals with a single action.

A less violent alternative to the phrase 'to kill two birds with one stone'.

I needed to post a letter and buy some bread, so I though I'd fill two needs with one deed and stop at the mailbox on the way to the store.

by Ausgirl123 January 27, 2019

life is two dates and a dash

When you go on a date with a women and on the second date you get her pregnant so you make a run for it.

On my second date I got my girl pregnant so I moved to Canada.

life is two dates and a dash

by Dem guy January 29, 2019