When you tie up a hooker with a yeast infection, squirt a whole bottle of yellow mustard in her vagina and then bang her with your sweaty, salty, post workout dick.
by Megawreckindaddyhitler June 16, 2019
Get the Dirty Pretzelmug. A twisted, convoluted argument that sounds reasonable on the surface but makes absolutely no sense when examined closely. Often used by manipulative people to avoid accountability or dismiss someone else's valid feelings.
Etymology: Derived from the way actual pretzels are twisted into impossible shapes - much like how some people twist basic logic until it's completely unrecognizable.
Common characteristics:
Uses fancy words to sound smart
Contains circular reasoning
Makes the listener question their own sanity
Usually delivered with complete confidence
Falls apart immediately under scrutiny
Etymology: Derived from the way actual pretzels are twisted into impossible shapes - much like how some people twist basic logic until it's completely unrecognizable.
Common characteristics:
Uses fancy words to sound smart
Contains circular reasoning
Makes the listener question their own sanity
Usually delivered with complete confidence
Falls apart immediately under scrutiny
"My ex gave me a total logic pretzel when he said he couldn't validate my feelings because they contradicted his feelings. Like, sir, that's not how emotions work."
Example in a sentence: "Don't let him feed you that logic pretzel - two people can have different opinions about the same event and both be valid!"
Example in a sentence: "Don't let him feed you that logic pretzel - two people can have different opinions about the same event and both be valid!"
by PixelbrushProductions June 3, 2025
Get the Logic Pretzelmug. A unit of time. There are three years in a pretzel year. This is because there are three holes in every pretzel
by Cragnon March 7, 2024
Get the Pretzel Yearmug. A sex position for professionals
Friend 1: heyyy gurrrrl how was your one night stand
Friend 2: we were both pros so we tried the Pretzel Dip. Here’s how the move went: I lay on my right side, and he kneeled down, straddling my right leg. I wrapped my left leg around his torso and thrusted and grinded, and we used our hands to please each other further. We kept eye contact the whole time, dirty talking while tangled up together. Orgasming was easy, and every part of my body felt pleasure.
Friend 2: we were both pros so we tried the Pretzel Dip. Here’s how the move went: I lay on my right side, and he kneeled down, straddling my right leg. I wrapped my left leg around his torso and thrusted and grinded, and we used our hands to please each other further. We kept eye contact the whole time, dirty talking while tangled up together. Orgasming was easy, and every part of my body felt pleasure.
by Kachinonai April 27, 2024
Get the Pretzel Dipmug. Friend 1: Oh my god I have so much work to do im going to kill myself.
Friend 2: Don't say stuff like that.
Friend 1: Fine... I'm going to eat a pretzel.
Friend 2: Your missing the point.
Friend 2: Don't say stuff like that.
Friend 1: Fine... I'm going to eat a pretzel.
Friend 2: Your missing the point.
by mtfort February 22, 2018
Get the Eat a pretzelmug. A sex position for professionals.
Here’s how the Pretzel Dip move went: I lay on my right side, and he kneeled down, straddling my right leg. I wrapped my left leg around his torso and thrusted and grinded, and we used our hands to please each other further. We kept eye contact the whole time, dirty talking while tangled up together. Orgasming was easy, and every part of my body felt pleasure.
by Kachinonai April 27, 2024
Get the Pretzel Dipmug. The crusty Kimberly dust that is found firmly impregnated in the salty nose residue that is blown out onto a Gibb River Road tissue.
"This Gibb River Pretzel is slightly different in both taste and texture to the Nullabor oysters that I'm used to!"
by Haniel Docking June 19, 2021
Get the Gibb River Pretzelmug.