“There’s no toilet paper left John”
“Don’t worry Jenny we’ve got 3 kiwis, you’ll just have to do a dirty kiwi”
“Don’t worry Jenny we’ve got 3 kiwis, you’ll just have to do a dirty kiwi”
by Eggie Benis November 23, 2023
Get the Dirty Kiwi mug.You’ll often find a “Kiwi Breakfast” on the menu of a New Zealand cafe. Besides the produce being local, there is nothing inherently “Kiwi” about it. Its literally an English Breakfast… except it in New Zealand, so therefore it’s “Kiwi”.
Kiwi waiter: “would you like to try our Kiwi Breakfast “
English tourist: “yeah sure”
20 minutes later…
English tourist: “this is literally an English breakfast without black pudding”
English tourist: “yeah sure”
20 minutes later…
English tourist: “this is literally an English breakfast without black pudding”
by Poseidon’s Kiss December 9, 2023
Get the Kiwi Breakfast mug.by slimecicle lover fr December 14, 2023
Get the Kiwi Day mug.The ACTUAL inventors of pavlovas.
Uhhhh, kiwis are usually seen at the dairy or in new zealand, both basically the same.
Uhhhh, kiwis are usually seen at the dairy or in new zealand, both basically the same.
by Vassie_thy_meme_god October 28, 2019
Get the Kiwi mug.Kinda like a slave.
The average people of New Zealand, a country in the South Pacific with extreme centrist politics and deep resentment for anything that suffers. They’re lovely people, just don’t expect them to care much about anything outside their sphere.
Rogernomics has pervaded every aspect of the known universe to the typical kiwi, a blind and gormless creature trapped on an island under dark and mysterious foreign influences. Socially defined by the legacy of Jimmy Busby (a legendary Aussie pisshead,) together Billy Hobson and his Merry Band of Psychopaths, The NZ Police, better known as ‘The Pigs’, continue to enforce the marginalisation of anything that looks weird to them, thus defining the general mood of entitled NIMBYism amongst kiwis, the aspiring Mum & Dad Investor.
Whilst kiwis are held up as an emblem of New Zealand, they are in fact quite rare. Most of them are actually experimental automatons, deployed to model optimal consumer behaviour in order to test new and novel population level manipulation techniques in a controlled environment. Kiwis are test subjects, mostly ignorant of their surreptitious paradigm of self determination and participation in wider society.
The average people of New Zealand, a country in the South Pacific with extreme centrist politics and deep resentment for anything that suffers. They’re lovely people, just don’t expect them to care much about anything outside their sphere.
Rogernomics has pervaded every aspect of the known universe to the typical kiwi, a blind and gormless creature trapped on an island under dark and mysterious foreign influences. Socially defined by the legacy of Jimmy Busby (a legendary Aussie pisshead,) together Billy Hobson and his Merry Band of Psychopaths, The NZ Police, better known as ‘The Pigs’, continue to enforce the marginalisation of anything that looks weird to them, thus defining the general mood of entitled NIMBYism amongst kiwis, the aspiring Mum & Dad Investor.
Whilst kiwis are held up as an emblem of New Zealand, they are in fact quite rare. Most of them are actually experimental automatons, deployed to model optimal consumer behaviour in order to test new and novel population level manipulation techniques in a controlled environment. Kiwis are test subjects, mostly ignorant of their surreptitious paradigm of self determination and participation in wider society.
When we first arrived in New Zealand, my family and I were so grateful for the opportunity. Kiwis were so nice and welcoming and everybody was so kind, I got a job in a taxi which paid almost as much as I earned as an orthopaedic surgeon in India. The hospitals here are fine establishments, the kiwi doctors were very professional when my son was beaten to bloody pulp at school for being different. Our kiwi landlord is a kind man, he’s giving us a big discount so we only pay $22,000 a month for a very comfortable apartment in Sandringham, and there are only nine families sharing two showers and three toilets! I’m sure he will repair the holes and leaks soon, it’s only been three years since we mentioned it to him and he’s very busy with all his RSE workers.
by Mr42 November 17, 2021
Get the Kiwi mug.
A kiwi is a person who is beautiful on the inside but insecure about the outside, some ppl love the outside as much as the inside amd some ppl sadly dont
by kiwi heree August 5, 2021
Get the kiwi mug.