Garfield Kart

A 3DS game from 2015 that was created by God himself. Ancient Byzantine empires held Garfield Kart on a golden pedestal, which caused many a global conflict. WW1 was actually caused when Archduke Franz Ferdinand came into a copy of Garfield Kart: Epic Jesus Corkscrew Edition, and Gavrilo Princip was like, "Oh hell nah, I'm finna kill this boi."

Jesus: Can I have video game making abilities to please our subjects?

God: Of course, son.

Jesus: *Actually makes Garfield Kart, which causes eternal turmoil*

Also Jesus: wOrLd WaR tImE.

by TheLastHomicide November 29, 2018

Garfield Sex Music

The freakiest, nastiest, and baddest music on the planet. Like Waka Flocka Flame, only a million times harder. Listening to it is the closest thing your ears can come to fucking. In fact, the soundwave this music makes is a big schlobbing dick, trolling for something to rub up against and cum all over. When white girls hear it, they immediately find the first guy they see and make him 1manDP her.

Don't even try to make it, only Andy Samberg, Jorma Taccone, and Akiva Schaffer can, and the only reason why is because they gave head to Ziggy Stardust, the eternal god of music, FOR 500 YEARS. But at least they get pussy all the time now.

Random Bitch: I love your Garfield sex music.
Kiv: Bitch, shut the fuck up and lick my nuts.
Random Bitch: But I can't see them!
Kiv: Yeah, cause they're the size of ovaries. Now do some more coke and keep licking

Jorma: Hey Arlene, let's fuck.
Arlene: But I'm a cat.
Jorma: Whatever (whips out his dick)
Arlene: YES! It's so small!

Andy: (Walking around with his dick out around New York City) Who wants to fuck me?
Jennifer Anniston: I do! I do! I'll do anything for sperm!

Andy: Let's do this, bitch. (Flips her over and 1manDPs her on top of the Empire State Building) Marmaduke, get in here! (Marmaduke sticks his dog dick in Jennifer's ass)

Jen: Double Anal! Yes!
Andy: (Pulls out, and cums all over her face.) Now that's Garfield Sex Music.

by Titus Blowhard May 9, 2011

garfield middle school

It sucks all the popular kids are rude and dumb. all the boys think they are hot but they are really gay. The 6th grade girls think think their sexy and hot but they haven't had their period yet or hit puberty. But theres air conditioning so that great. But the whole place so stupid. THE TEACHER ARE SECRETLY RAPISTS

Garfield Middle School SUCKKS

by ANONYMOUS_PERSON_IN_GMS March 2, 2017

garfielf

stuffing your face as usual.

I gotta have a good meal

Garfield, you fat cat you are so big and fat why are you so fat

I eat, Jon. it's what I do

it's time to kick odie of the table

dont do it garfielf, that's our pet dog odie

you're going into orbit, you stupid mutt

GAAAAARRRFIIIELD!!!

time for a nap. I'm a cat who loves to snooze

garfield you lazy cat

I hate alram clocks

I'm am hungry I want some lasaga

you're eating us out of house and home, garmfield

enough with The Chit Chat let's get some grub going

Grub time...

where Are the 3-cheese pizzas

I ate those food

where Are the taco shells?

I ate those food

where did all the hamburger helper go

*brup*

You're such a bad kitty that's it I've had it with you that does it i'm done that's the last straw grarfileld

garfielf

by Macroplanet May 24, 2021

garfieldism

A religion that was inadvertently created by Garfield that promotes doing nothing all day.

He won't get off the couch because he is a follower of garfieldism.

by BananaHat63 March 16, 2017

Schlong garage

1. An inviting vagina.
2. A familiar vagina where one can safely park a schlong.

You guys stay out, but I'm going home early. Why spend more money when I can go work that schlong garage back home?

by Delores Spomoni March 1, 2009

garage sale trail

The path most consumer technology takes, from gee wiz. to so what, to make an offer. In other words technology will become quickly outdated and lose most of its value. The rule of the garage sale trail is a curse to the first owner but a blessing for the next owner.

The rule of the garage sale trail makes a $1,000 tv worth $50 in 5 years.

by knowman December 20, 2011