mental gymnastics

The act of trying to justify actions or validate opinions not supported by any facts. A means of dealing with cognitive dissonance.

"Hey Jessica, you're really pretty today."
"Oh so you're saying that yesterday I was looking like shit. Also you're saying that because I'm a white fit woman. That makes you a pathetic misogynist and racist. Let's not mention the fact that if I didn't pander to your sexuality, I would be called unattractive and ugly. You, John, are a dumbass and a patriarchal pig, do you know how stressful it is to be a woman and having to look sexy 24 7 just so men get horny in this society? You don't, because you are such a privileged white male."
"Wow Jessica that was some serious mental gymnastics you did right there..."

by DaHelpR January 9, 2022

hamster gymnastics

ham•ster gym•nas•tics

/ˈhamstər jimˈnastiks/

1. Going to great lengths to justify, rationalize, or otherwise explain away a wrongdoing or shitty action/behavior

2. A combination of both 'hamstering' and 'mental gymnastics'

My girlfriend cheated on me. She said she had a dream I cheated on her, so her cheating was justified. Except her dream happened the morning after she cheated on me. I'm surprised she didn't strain herself doing those hamster gymnastics.

by TheTallestPsychonaut January 3, 2021

Elastics Gymnastics

Any series of physical exercises designed to squeeze one’s arse into a pair of pantyhose, snug jeans, and such.

I almost collapsed from exhaustion and dehydration after a grueling session of elastics gymnastics with a pair of tights.

by Fruity Ana March 4, 2009

subway gymnastics

Any variety of wild, crazy, and retarded antics you can accomplish by hanging off of the poles, overhead grab bars, and other structures inside of a moving subway car. Usually occurs late at night when the subway is basically empty, with a relatively large group of people, and preceded by copious amounts of drinking.

A: "Damn, Alex looks dizzy--he just did a double backflip off the grab bar then spun around the center pole upside down like 15 times."
B: "Dude, I think he's gonna puke. Subway gymnastics are dangerous."

by Adamator November 10, 2007

Rhythmic Gymnastics

Commonly mistaken for artistic gymnatics. Rhythmic gymnastics incorporates the use of hand-held apparatus with music. These apparatus include Rope, Hoop, Ball, Clubs and Ribbon. Rhythmic gymnasts are extremly flexible and most incoporate ballet lessons into their training. This sport is not for the faint hearted.
*PLEASE NOTE - Rhythmic Gymnasts CANNOT do flips and will hurt you if you ask!

Dumb Ass Guy:
'What sport do you do?'

Gymnast:
'Rhythmic Gymnastics.'

Dumb Ass Guy:
'OH COOl! So you can do flips?'

Gymnast:
'No DUMB ASS! That's artistic gymnastics!'
*Stabs Dumb Ass Guy then walks away*

by rgchik December 9, 2008

mental gymnastics

a slang term for the mental ability that can be very effective in dealing with cognitive dissonance

A Bible researcher can do mental gymnastics to convince himself the timbers he found in a snowy Russian mountain were remains of Noah's Ark.

by robbie38903849 June 18, 2008

Mens Gymnastics

The strongest most athletic athletes on earth. Men's hardest sport

He does mens gymnastics, he works around 40 hours a week.

by Optox January 26, 2011