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Fortune Cookie

A "fortune cookie" happens when a woman's panties get stuck between her vaginal lips. One must pick the "fortune cookie" out, for it is quite uncomfortable to leave it there. It is also described as a wedgie from the other side.
*Girl digging hand in her pants*
Boy - ehEM.. WHAT are you doing?
Girl - Sorry! I have a fortune cookie going on down there.
by onlytalENT November 21, 2013
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Fortune Cookie

When you take a giant shit in the bathroom of a restaurant you have just eaten at.

At some restaurants, you never get them, while at others, you always do. Even when you do, you can never be 100% sure of the specific outcome.
Man, that was some intense hot pot! Alright, I'm gonna go check my fortune cookie, and then let's head to the bar.
by maverick_davidian October 19, 2013
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Fortune cookie

Fold her in half and break her like a fortune cookie.
by Von Chickenfoot March 11, 2017
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Fortune Cookie

a girl of oriental ethnicity; (usually Chinese) but can be more than likely mistaken for a jumpoff...(mainly because of her looks)
hey, I saw this super-bad fortune cookie the other day...
by Full Court* February 4, 2021
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Fortune Cookie Religion

Fortune Cookie Religion describes religious beliefs that are not based on reading religious texts in their entirety but by reading one disjointed verse at a time, as though getting small doses of wisdom akin to a fortune cookie.

The reader then forces that one short verse to apply to their lives and those around them without reading the chapters before or after. This style of religion creates a tendancy for the words to be misinterpretted or taken out of context. Also the reader usually does very little to understand the culture at the time, or other inferences surrounding the time and place that the scripture was written.

In essence it is a shallow religious base comprised of little effort or research on the part of the person. Someone who is Fortune Cookie Religious likes little sayings, quotes, and things with bits of scripture on them, to outwardly show to others that they are religious, but rarely do they read their religious texts themselves. They wait for someone else to tell them what to believe.
Jane's Fortune Cookie Religion involves her reading her Zen Calendar every day.

Tom's made a Fortune Cookie Religion out of reading his horoscope.

Sally's turned reading the Bible into a Fortune Cookie Religion with the way she opens it and points to a random verse, hoping that it will show her the way.
by Lindsay Archer July 14, 2007
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fortune cookie-ing

verb. to help someone in a time of need and support them. to give someone cliche advice that would sound like advice received from a fortune cookie. this advice may seem silly but take it seriously, it WILL help
Jose: I don't know what to do

Kat: the heart wants what the heart wants, let it guide you

Jose: hah, nice fortune cookie-ing
by RejectedWeIrDo April 22, 2011
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fortune cookie wisdom

When somebody claims to be smart, but half of the shit they say is obvious and can be found in a fortune cookie.
Asshole - Work hard and you will be okay.
Normal Guy - No shit, thanks for the fortune cookie wisdom, asshat.
by ILikeDefiningThings August 26, 2018
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