Satanic Jesus

Jesus with horns, a pitchfork and a devil's tail adorned with a crown of thorns. He has a shepherd's crook and a pentagram necklace. Ruler of Hellven. He walks on cloven hoof. You must forgive him for everybody's sins since he's taking responsibility for them.

"The rod and the staff of Satanic Jesus is the comforting key to eternal salivation!"

by ANOTHERDEADROMEO April 27, 2023

Jesus Loves You

A statement which you respond to by saying "IN THE ASS"! You can also initiate the conversation yourself by telling someone that Jesus loves them. After hesitating a bit, you can add the additional "IN THE ASS" part to the end of your statement.

"Jesus loves you... IN THE ASS!"

by ANOTHERDEADROMEO April 29, 2023

Deviled Jesus

It's kind of like a deviled crab, but it's a Jesus with crab claws. You can also spell out the name of Jesus on a plate of deviled eggs for a similar comparison.

"This is the Church of Satanic Jesus. Let me hear it for Deviled Jesus! Can I get a BOOM SHAKALAKA?"

by ANOTHERDEADROMEO May 5, 2023

Jesus cable

A Jesus cable is a cable that will likely cause death, fire or an explosion, like a 220V to USB-C cable.

Mate A: Don't plug that one in.
Mate B: Why?
Mate A: It's a Jesus cable, you'll die if you do.

by SmokeAlt2EveryDay August 21, 2023

Lord Jesus

The way, the truth, and the life, and no one goes to the father except through confessing that Jesus is Lord, and believing in your heart that God raised him from the dead.

Lord Jesus will do good to you, Because he is the Lord.

by rimnuthefolf September 7, 2023

Jesus Salad

A dietary suppliment

Jesus Salad is good for the digestive system. Jesus Salad is a healthy meal containing lettuce, radish, carrots and Greek dressing.

by JReverend September 14, 2023

Jesus Lighting

Jesus Lighting is the result of a camera focusing on you with light in the background resulting in the person in the photograph being surrounded by heavenly white

Person 1: “How was the visit at the park with your friend?”

Person 2: “Good; very sunny, I took a picture of my friend facing the sun and when I looked at the photo, I got him in Jesus Lighting”

Person 1: “lmao”

*may or may not be based on a true story*

by roach.baddie September 15, 2023