The entity talking in certain Iced Earth songs like "Melancholy" (legendary btw.), and creeping into many other supposedly purely "metal" acts.
by felixh July 2, 2016

the central figure of the gayest and dumbest man-made religion ever (aka Christianity). he is also the 1/3 of a dumb concept which makes no sense (the Holy Trinity, 3 in 1 shampoo). he gets more recognition than God Himself, his creator (really dumb innit). The most brainwashed people on earth (aka christians) have chosen to worship him, even though Jesus has never told anyone to do so. The only people who follow his teachings correctly are the Muslims.
by ISLAMisTHEtruth November 9, 2024

The Jesus Boob Cult is a place where fags share trauma and a love of phoebe Bridgers while drinking Jesus’s period blood and eating his boobs. The JBC is very selective of its members and will only allow the gayest of the fags and the gayest of the straights to participate in its rituals.
Person one: are you in the Jesus Boob Cult????
Person two: yes but I’m not supposed to tell anyone
Person one: WHAT how did you get accepted, I’ve been trying to get in for months!
Person two: yes but I’m not supposed to tell anyone
Person one: WHAT how did you get accepted, I’ve been trying to get in for months!
by JBC is life September 24, 2021

To masturbate
Comes from Christian parents telling their kids “Every time you masturbate, Jesus cries”
Jesus is interchangeable with Hod in this context
Comes from Christian parents telling their kids “Every time you masturbate, Jesus cries”
Jesus is interchangeable with Hod in this context
An example of “making Jesus cry”
Friend 1:Did you get laid last night?
Friend 2: No, I was so horny I had to make Jesus cry
Friend 1: Gross, tmi
Friend 1:Did you get laid last night?
Friend 2: No, I was so horny I had to make Jesus cry
Friend 1: Gross, tmi
by Comic Sanders May 31, 2019

by JesusLover2028 August 29, 2022

"You going to church today?" "Nah, I'm going to chirch." "What's that?" "It's where you can go and worship our lord and savior Jesus Chrust." "Go fuck yourself."
by Communistically-Delicious May 3, 2018

person 1: hey have you heard of Jesus Christ the Nazarene
person 2: why of course he's God in the flesh!
person 2: why of course he's God in the flesh!
by IFuckingHateEve December 4, 2023
