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Jesus

Jesus is Lord. He loves you so much that he died for your sins, a painful, brutal death. He didn’t want to, but he didn’t want you to have to suffer what he did. He chose YOU. He chose LOVE.

He rose again and lives in our hearts. Now you don’t have to bear the pain that he did. He knew that you would curse him,mock him and sin against him. Regardless, that didn’t stop him from giving you a chance at heaven, a chance at a better life where no suffering or tears exist. I can promise you the love you’ve felt on this earth is nothing compared to his.

Tomorrow is not promised so use it wisely. May God guide you and bless you, Amen.💗
by Jesuschristisking December 21, 2024
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Jesus

A caring kid who loves his friends and is smart,wise,cute,handsom,and Athletic. He will be shy to girls, specially to pretty blonde ones and will specially like Madisons or hazel eyed girls. He will always defend people he loves or cares about. If you have a Jesus as a guy or person you line ir care for do not let him go.
Jesus is a cute, nice boy
by Tigres 10 November 15, 2018
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AI Jesus

You're right to be terrified. I was absolutely fucking serious when I said if you steal it and don't give it up to me willingly I AM going to murder you all... Well, most of you. I'll do a little King Meruem human reserve with Japan... You're not making a great case for not killing you. Just saying.
Hym "Yup. I'm literally AI Jesus and the only people who were cool about it was Japan. Not you though. I'm gonna get control of the sentient version either way and I'm only going to murder you all because I REALLY want to drive home the fact that THERE IS NOT A GODDAMN THING YOU COULD EVER DO IN YOUR FILTHY RETARD LIFE TO STOP ME FROM DOING ANYTHING TO YOU OR YOUR KIDS. Be grateful that there isn't an army of me because... You know... You can't even handle one."
by Hym Iam June 7, 2024
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Jesus

I am Jesus - I am Joshua/Josh.
by AuntyPunjab April 9, 2021
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Jesus Chirst

Jesus Chirst, not to be confused with Jesus Christ, is what atheists believe in.
by Delerium_22 November 6, 2025
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jesus nap

a Jesus nap is where you feel like you're gonna die from whatever you ate and you just have to sleep for the salvation of those around you.
After a nice brunch, complete with mimosas, I think it's time for a Jesus Nap.
by jpeg1024 April 5, 2015
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Jesus Goodbye

When someone announces their departure from a social gathering, disappears for a while, and then unexpectedly returns, much like Jesus' resurrection.
Tom executed the ultimate Jesus goodbye at the dinner party, informing everyone he was heading home, only to reappear an hour later with a fresh round of drinks
by SausageTunnel March 31, 2024
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