João De Jesus

João De Jesus is the most amazing person you'll ever meet, when he comes into your life he will be ur highest point and only take you higher. He has a 11 incher and going strong, He's caring and the sweetestperson you'll ever meet, curious about the world and all the cultures and histories and fucken smexxxxy in a hoodie. Has multiple pink florida shorts and even though he acts gay and retared he isn't ( the game part), he loles to work on himslef and fet better and gives back to the community, may or may not be racists, he comforts well and is understanding

He has a beautiful soul and a beautiful at of seeing life and will open u up so many new experiences, he will be the best thing that will ever happen to you.

Jack : " if João De Jesus was gay id hit that"
Bob : " nah he's just a little dyslexic, but he's the best person you'll ever know"

by He's my world March 27, 2024

Ryan (Jesus)

I've the body and power of Christ but my mind has been replaced with the the spawn of Satan

AHH have you seen Ryan (Jesus) over there

by NNN is for losers May 28, 2021

Jesus

Why?
Why?
Hey Daddy I smack these hoes
I stuck my pee-pee in some Cherrios
I got a pencil in my nose
And I beat my dipar everywhere I go

Like to hop hop like a bunny
Pooped my pants now its runny
I go Ungnt-Ungnt, think thats funny?
I stuff my dipar with all my money

Hey daddy jesus your a sausage!! ugh ugh

by Finnisflawed April 6, 2022

marijuana jesus

marijuana jesus is a person who smokes the holy plant cannabis, walks on water, and is made up.

marijuana jesus: that was some nice bud judas
judas: im gonna go betray you and smoke all your weed

by marijuana jesus December 9, 2016

pipe Jesus

Sani ys

Have you ever played team fortress 2 with Sani, he’s good with pipe grenades, one could say he’s pipe Jesus

by Spycrab505 December 25, 2022

Jesus Christ Sponge

Commonly referring to the pads of non-working lame excuse for a cleaning tool otherwise known as Shamwow.

It's a fucking Jesus Christ Sponge! Run from the soakage!

by JellysWalkinOnAir December 30, 2009

sonia jesus

Someone that has a secret crush on a milf that he knows. Doesn’t have the guts too say it to here, but if Jesus had the chance he would have smashed that ass of Sonia when that leotard at the club was looking delicious that night.

Sonia jesus Marcos best friend really wants to express his fleeing with you

by Soniajesuslove July 9, 2022