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Toilet Dildo

A jet stream of water from a rigged toilet that shoots up your butthole, and thereby raping you with your own bodily wastes.
Guy-scarred-for-life: That toilet back fired on me!!!
Prankster: How did you enjoy your toilet dildo?
by JKDBLV July 30, 2010
mugGet the Toilet Dildomug.

Toilet Jokes

Things to do when in a public restrooom.
1.Stick your open palm under the stall wall and ask your neighbor, "May I borrow a highlighter?"

2. Say, "Uh oh, I knew I shouldn't have put my lips on that."

3. Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.

4. Say, "Yuck, this water's cold."

5. Drop a marble and say, "Oh Fooey! My glass eye!"

6. Say, "Hmmm, I've never seen that color before."

7. Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a
Cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a height of 6 feet. Sigh relaxingly.

8. Say, "Now how did that get there?"

9. Say, "Humus. Reminds me of humus."

10. Fill up a large flask with Mountain Dew. Squirt it
Erratically under the stall walls of your neighbors while yelling, "Whoa! easy boy!"

11. Say, "Interesting... more floaters than sinkers."

12. Using a small squeeze tube, spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet paper and drop the wad under the stall wall of your neighbor. Then say, "Whoops, could you kick that back over here please?"

13. Say, "C'mon Mr. Happy! Don't fall asleep on me."

14. Fill a balloon with creamed corn. Rush into the stall with your hand over your mouth and let out a lengthy vomit impression while you squeeze the balloon and splatter cream corn all about. Apologize profusely and blame it on the fettuccine alfredo you had for breakfast.

15. Say, "Boy, that sure looks like a maggot."

16. Say, "Daren’t, I knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I going to do?"

17. Play a well known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.

18. Before you unroll toilet paper, conspicuously lay down your Cross-Dressers Anonymous" newsletter on the floor visible to the adjacent stall.

19. Lower a small mirror underneath the stall wall, adjust it so you can see your neighbor and say, "Peek-a-boo!"

20. Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall wall and sing
"Born Free".

(WARNING: Use these Toilet Jokes at own risk.)
by Bonus_Satis April 21, 2008
mugGet the Toilet Jokesmug.

toilet paper

1. A soft paper-like product that you use to clean your anus after you poop.

2. A product that flys nicely over nieghbors trees.
I just wiped my ass with some toilet paper.

Damn, That was a good throw, man I think the toilet paper hit every branch on the way down that tree!
by Stevereno January 15, 2007
mugGet the toilet papermug.

Skidibi toilet

"skidibi toilet is funny!!!"
"kys"
by Rgdp August 4, 2023
mugGet the Skidibi toiletmug.

Skibidi Toilet

This skibidi toilet shit is a fucking cartoon with a head sticking out of a toilet bowl or something I dont fucking know, the only people who actually find it funny are crusty ass 4 year olds on youtube shorts. Im not ready for the rise of gen alpha god fucking damn it
Toddler 1: sticking out your gyat for the rizzlerrr 💯🔥🔥
Toddler 2: youre so skibidi 😍😘
Toddler 3: I looove skibidi toilet guyz❤️ 🔥
by LexiOLexi October 19, 2023
mugGet the Skibidi Toiletmug.

Toilet Paper

1. This is the shit ticket that your toilet eats
2. Once you go brown you flush it down
Is recycled toilet paper supposed to come in a tinted shade?
by Scotty Tissue November 15, 2010
mugGet the Toilet Papermug.

spooning the toilet

The act of wrapping ones self around a toilet during a long vomiting session (after drinking) because standing is not possible after the first half hour. Can also be observed if said person passes-out in position.
Approximately 2:00 in the afternoon on Josh's 21st birthday:

"Where's Josh?"

"He's already spooning the toilet."

"Did you get pictures?"
by bteen3 December 18, 2007
mugGet the spooning the toiletmug.

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