scorch the porcelain

When a particularly brutal poo leaves the toilet bowl in need of a good scrub to remove traces of the 'splashdown and slide' of the offending turd, into the deeper waters of the u-bend.

Sorry to scorch the porcelain John. You got some rubber gloves and a brush handy?

by MikeG5 August 17, 2016

porcelain pet

Another name for poo, doo doo, taking the browns to the Superbowl.

"Man I gotta squeeze out a porcelain pet right about now"

by Randomhero20 February 14, 2021

porcelain bliss

After a night out when your vomiting in the toilet and rest your head on the cool porcelain, giving you the feeling of utter bliss.

Deb went out last night and drunk way more then she should have. During the morning she experienced the porcelain bliss.

by Industries. March 25, 2019

porcelain ponder

When you're having a think whilst sitting on the toilet

Hey Kate, where did you go?
I was having a porcelain ponder and came up with a plan.

by TEAMDONGA December 9, 2021

porcelain challenge

TikTok trend in which people grind up antique porcelain and snort it like cocaine

Hey did you hear about the porcelain challenge? It’s really dangerous

by eleventeenfrogs October 2, 2022

Porcelain phone

The toilet, specifically when one is hunched over it vomiting loudly.

I got so drunk last night that I ended calling Ralph long distance on the great white porcelain phone.

by Mr70Homers October 16, 2021

Porcelain Chipper

A rare condition where a person (usually a male) expels an overpowering stream of urine, causing him to stand several feet away from the urinal / toilet.

While I was in the bathroom during halftime at a football game, I saw a porcelain chipper peeing from across the room… I felt both bad and impressed with his accuracy.

by Yazorillowitz March 27, 2025