Time Blindness

The typical Zoomer excuse for badly handled time management.

Boss: Why were you an hour and a half late for work???
Anon: Sorry, my time blindness makes me forget I have things to do in an timely fashion. Sorry!
Boss: Sorry! You're fired. Do better in future jobs please.

by LimeSenpai October 14, 2023

Blind nut

When your friend or a coworker sets you up with someone you’ve never met to just have sex. Similar to a blind date

“Chad set me up on a blind nut last night. I guess he thought I was gay, but it was still the best sex I’ve ever had.”

by Tsaucee September 10, 2020

Ketchup Blindness

A rare phenomenon wherein the affected person can not find the item they are looking for in the refrigerator, despite looking directly at it several times. Affects more than one in seven married men.

Husband: Why are we always out of ketchup?
Wife: What are you talking about it's literally right in front of your face!
Husband: Oh, no... I have ketchup blindness.
Wife: Noooooooo!

by jeorb87 December 10, 2020

banter blindness

When you talk too much on dating apps before meeting, you have a hard time accepting when they're not right for you IRL.

We talked so much before it was awkward when we didn't connect. I think I'm going to go on a second date to be sure. Maybe I'm just suffering from banter blindness.

by alpal86 June 13, 2017

drivers blind

When someone takes a hit while driving and gets smoke in their eyes causing them to go blind for a few seconds. this is a very dangerous disease that has plagued stoners since the invention of the automobile.

driver: Bro pass the blunt!

passenger:Here man it's roasting

Driver:(takes a massive hit way beyond his smoking abilities...so smoke goes everywhere) FUCK! Drivers blind we're going to crash bro!!
passenger:(becomes a stoned hero and grabs the wheel before they crash) I got you bro.

by passenger117 March 30, 2011

Audibly blind

Audibly blind, refers to the total inability to hear sounds. Symptoms may be severe and may experience real world packet loss. People who are profoundly audibly blind can hear nothing at all. Scientist are yet to discover how such individuals find themselves reliant to.

*playing Black Ops 3 search and destroy. When an unexpected 1v1 occurs*

Team Mate: use glitch

Audibly blind person: ...

Team mate: USE GLITCH

audibly blind person: ...

Team mate:✊👇👋👎🤏👈✋💨

Audibly blind person: ...

*dies*

by PartTimeShotCaller June 1, 2020

Blind Attack

A driving technique in which the driver turns off the headlights in order to overtake another vehichle.
Most commonly used between street racers.

Wait! That's not the sound of my engi-FOREVEEERR TOGETHEEER
Takumi using the Blind Attack on Tomoyuki's EK9.

by The "Undertaker" March 14, 2023