Plumdog's Law

Any sufficiently tweet-worthy fuckup is impossible to differentiate from shitty viral marketing campaign

One assumes that they didn't lead with that story, but it's Plumdog's Law again

Plumdog's Law by Tegularius00 September 27, 2018

Mother in Law Cocktail 

A large highball glass with one
Large ice cube and at least four fingers of your favorite liquor, usually consumed in multiples of 2.-

Mother in Law Cocktail: “Got to grab a handle of vodka so I can have a couple
Mother in-laws when I get home so I can have dinner with
My mother in law who lives in my
Basement”

Mother in Law Cocktail by schnock123 October 3, 2018

culture-in-law 

when you a white boy from Nowhere, Kansas, but you wife a fine brown girl who actually has a culture and now you’re basically brown

white boy 1: yeah I’m African

white boy 2: bru you’re from Topeka
1: yeah my dude but my girl Passion from Nairobi
2: wuttttt
1: y’know, it’s my culture-in-law yo
2: wtf, Adam

culture-in-law by thegrbgreceptacle October 9, 2018

Murphy's Law of Accessibility 

Refers to the infuriating situation of something you need's usually being at the bottom of a pile, at the back of a drawer/shelf, etc.

I have a 2--vertical-layers-deep stack of plastic totes for storing my DVD-collection, arranged in alphabetical order. It's often the case that the disc I want to watch has a title that is near the end of the alphabet, though, and so I hafta laboriously remove all da rest of da crates to access the very back/bottom box... yep, a classic case of Murphy's Law of Accessibility!

Murphy's Law of Accessibility by QuacksO October 13, 2018

Murphy's Law of Engine-Idling Duration 

"If you leave your vehicle's engine running during a delay in proceeding (traffic-jam, road construction, accident-resolution, "stuck" red signal-light, etc.), you will be sitting there for many minutes, just wasting gas. The instant you turn the key off and climb out of your seat to stretch, however, THAT'S when the line of traffic will begin moving again, and thus you will have shut off your engine "for nothing", AND you will now be holding up everyone behind you while you hastily hop back into the driver's seat and re-start the engine so that you can move forward again."

I finally took da plunge and bought a second-hand Toyota Prius because I'd eventually had one too many cases of Murphy's Law of Engine-Idling Duration... the Prius automatically shuts down its power during stand-stills, and then uses its electric motor to provide instant mobility as soon as you're ready to go again.

Murphy's Law of Engine-Idling Duration by QuacksO October 20, 2018

Murphy's Law of Spares 

"If you buy just one of something, you will surely break it almost immediately, but if you buy one or more "spare" items to have "just in case", your "initial" item will miraculously escape damage no matter how many mishaps you endure, and thus those duplicate items will merely gather dust in the garage or at the back of your desk-drawer."

I have always tried to handle objects gently and carefully, but due to extreme forgetfulness and physical/mental/emotional infirmities, I tend to "be rough on my stuff" --- sitting/stepping on unobserved items, blundering into objects as I'm groggily stumbling to the bathroom in the middle of the night, soiling items or spilling/dropping stuff, etc., and so I occasionally attempt to "prepare for the future" by acquiring spares of the types of items which I typically seem to damage or break; only prob is that just as soon as I do "lay in for a rainy day" like that, the "currently-being-used" object that I had been procuring said spares for NEVER SEEMS TO ACTUALLY SUSTAIN SIGNIFICANT DAMAGE, and so all of those extras that I'd carefully tucked away just "sit there for decades"... talk about a classic case of "Murphy's Law of Spares"!

Murphy's Law of Spares by QuacksO November 23, 2018

Deveyra's Law 

"The idea of doing something is always better than the reality of it."

By creating an image of desire in a persons own head, when confront the object of desire in

their reality as opposed to their own head, they're forced to confront its features more realistically.
Wich can cause to a feeling of dissapointment.

ex 1: "- I were at this party and Deveyra's law applied. I should've stayed at home."
ex 2: "- "- Why did i agree on this hikingtrip? It sounded better at the time"
ex 3 "- "Hey you wanna come over?"

"-Sure!"

"- This dude never shutsup.. why did i bring him over?"

Deveyra's Law by Deveyra's Law December 10, 2018