closet hick

someone who doesn't appear to share the same physical traits or language as a hick, but demonstrates similar behavioral characteristics and intelligence regardless of income level or professional status; an emerging icon of the twenty-first century that has caused a plethora of ignorance, injustice, retroactive retardedness across many professions and a state of arrested development in mind, body and spirit; low-quality or the entire lacking of humor; a straight laced, highly anxietic, religiously-fundamental, fear-driven man or woman who relies on the daily news and their perspective church sermons to pat them on the butt and tell them they're good people without having to exert any effort or sacrifice to aid their fellow man

The financial analyst may preach and glut about his latest understanding of the numbers, but deep down he's just another closet hick run by the tricks and traits of baby-boomer Bob.

by chickenclutch November 11, 2010

closet librarian

one who displays librarian-like tendencies despite their best efforts to hide them; in fact they usually make no efforts to hide them whatsoever.

Niles Crane (from Frasier) is a closet librarian. There are many others who have not yet come out.

by NOTMYNECK August 13, 2007

Closet dick

A male who appears to be friendly but turns out to be a massive asshole when you really get to know him

I thought he was a really nice guy, but he's secretly a massive closet dick.

by fooddetector December 14, 2014

Closet Cunt

1. Noun
-A girl/woman who is falsely kind, yet is secretly a total bitch. Someone who you are probably obligated in some way to maintain a friendly relationship with but actually despise.

2. Verb
-To lock a cunt in a closet.

1. That girl I work with is a total closet cunt. She likes to act friendly but does things to make my life hell.

2. I found a cunt and locked that bitch in a closet.

by mother.goose July 10, 2010

thanos in the closet

a hilarious phrase that quackity made when he was doing his "awful furry discord servers" video on youtube.

WHY DID YOU TELL THEM ABOUT THANOS IN THE CLOSET

by God 0f hyperdeath February 24, 2019

closet bitch

A girl who appears to be very nice and friendly but is secretly extremely hateful and dislikes everyone whom she pretends to be nice to.

Austin was convinced Anna was an angel until she slapped him in the face for no apparent reason, that's when he realized she was a closet bitch

by barrettday69 March 16, 2010

information closet

A digital space (commonly a folder) where miscellaneous information that hasn't been put away properly is stored.

Don't look in that temporary folder, it's my information closet.

by pim-researcher November 8, 2009